Please help me review my essay on sports topic, especially its vocabulary and structures. Thank you so much!

Some countries achieve international sports by building specialized facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development?

To earn more success from international sports competitions, several nations direct financial support to their top athletes through providing them specialized equipment. While it can bring some advantages, there are also other adverse effects from this trend.

On the one hand, some contributions from this policy should be considered. Firstly, in terms of winning tournaments and championships, it is reasonable to put major sportsmen who are more likely to earn medals, especially gold medals, for the country under special investment. It will make resources use appropriately instead of being wasted to others who do not own extreme talent for those challenging competitions. Secondly, those champions can, in turn, become idols for their people, which bring enjoyment and feelings of successful to them. In fact, people tend to give their admiration to the winners rather than the losers. Finally, according to their considerable fame being widespread across the country, young generations can learn from their achievement and then, build their identities and create their own successes.

On the other hand, other unfair aspects should be mentioned, too. It is well acknowledged that the fund comes mainly from the government’s tax revenues which come from the payment of the entire society; therefore, most of the citizens must have their rights to access fully and equally all public sports institutions as the elite athletes. It is not only about demonstrating a true sportsmanship, but also about proving that there is always an equal treatment for every person in the society. Therefore, it will create a stable society.

In conclusion, despite the necessary requirement for the investment to elite sportsmen, it is still appropriate to create equivalent opportunities for people in terms of accessing to sports facilities in order to keep a settled society.