Please help me modify my cover letter(or motivation letter)

thank you very much!

Dear Professor:
I'm currently a second-year MSc student majoring in computer networks at xx university, and will complete my degree in September this year. I respectfully submit my candidature for the PhD position in "xx project", in response to your advertisement.

My studies in computer and communication field dates back to 2003, when I was admitted to the faculty of information engineering in xx University, a top-10 university in xx with strengths in science and engineering disciplines. Then,due to my good academic performance with a top 7% ranking in my department, I was recommended by the faculty to follow the international MSc program in xx university with full scholarship and tuition fee waver.
During the MSc program, I obtain a good knowledge of various aspects in networking area, such as network protocols, network simulation,network programming, related mathematics(graph theory,combinatorics,probability and traffic theory,algorithms and optimization) and so on. My strong interests and background in networking will be a big advantage for my future PhD study and research. Besides, I'm also interested in practical computer skills, such as OOP, scripts and math tools which greatly facilitate the studies and researches. Particularly, I'm interested in these areas: Wireless networking,P2P and distribution system as well as multimedia networking. The postions you advertised really attract me since they are to my interest and I meet the requirements well.

I have finished all the courses. Currently ,I'm working on the thesis "xx" under supervision of Prof xx. My task is:
- Propose some scheduling schemes for disseminating layered videos, which are encoded with Scalable Video Coding standard.
- Understand and modify the source codes of the discrete event simulator "xx" to implement the scheduling schemes and provide related simulation result.
- Evaluate performance through processing the simulation results. The evaluation is not confined to QoS. QoE(quality of experience) metrics, such
as PSNR of the received video on each peer, are also considered. So, some knowledge and analysis tools of video coding are involved.

Personally, I think I'm a optimistic,self-motivated and diligent student, with ambition to be successful in my career path. I would be most grateful if I was given the chance. Looking forward to your reply!