Please help me correct this essay ( Ielts writing task 2).

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils while other schools have a very relaxed dress code.

What are the advantages and disadvantages for children of having a school uniform?

My essay:

Uniform has an prevailing kind of cloth in the majority of schools in global scale. While some students claim that they are forced to abide by the institutions’ rules when it comes to uniforms, other schools allow students to wear as they wish. As far as I am concerned, having the uniform has both merits and demerits.

It cannot be denied that uniforms offer some enormous advantages. The first positive aspect is that the uniform plays a key role in mitigating the gap between rich and poor students. To illustrate, thanks to the same type of clothes, there is no difference on the outside appearance. For example, loads of schools in Viet Nam embodied the usage of uniform effectively as well as has witnessed radical changes in students’ attitude to other. Another aspect that should be mentioned is the economical benefit. Instead of being severe strain of having enough money to buy the uniform, students can simply purchase a few uniforms and wear them all the semesters.

Turning to another side of this argument, having the same dress code can also lead to some disadvantages. Firstly, the first cause for concern is a lack of a land of freedom. Instead of supporting individuals freedom, a uniform will prevent students from expressing themselves in the fundamental way: putting on what they feel comfortable in. Secondly, another negative side relates to aesthetic reasons. As a matter of fact, few of uniforms are not well-designed. In such cases, uniform might generate a sense of dissatisfaction and the overall students’ morale will decline, what’s more, in turn the quality of learning will be affected.

In conclude, I am convinced the idea that wearing the uniform has both benefits and drawbacks.