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Nicky lo Posted 14 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
Please help me correct the errors~
In recent years, with the improvement of people’s living standard , some people form a habit of raising small or domestic animals as their pets. Some raise fishes or birds as their pets.
However, some people object to the idea of raising animals as their pets.
To them, animals have their right to live a natural life like human beings. Besides, the way people raise animals as pets have a negative influence on the surroundings, such as dog’s chasing people on the street and so on.
What’s more, some animals will transmit some diseases.
In my opinion, I like the idea of raising animals as pets.
On one hand, to those lonely elderly people who live alone, communicate with their pets can fulfill their lonely life.
On the other hand, raising pets can arise children’s responsibility and sociability,
However, some people object to the idea of raising animals as their pets.
To them, animals have their right to live a natural life like human beings. Besides, the way people raise animals as pets have a negative influence on the surroundings, such as dog’s chasing people on the street and so on.
What’s more, some animals will transmit some diseases.
In my opinion, I like the idea of raising animals as pets.
On one hand, to those lonely elderly people who live alone, communicate with their pets can fulfill their lonely life.
On the other hand, raising pets can arise children’s responsibility and sociability,
Top answer
Hello, Nicky. You repeat too much. I have struck out unnecessary verbiage and underlined some problems.
- Hello, Nicky.
- You repeat too much.
- I have struck out unnecessary verbiage and underlined some problems.
- Please correct them and post your revised text here.
- In recent years, with the improvement of people’s living standard , some people form a habit of raising small or domestic animals as their pets.
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1 Answers
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Hello, Nicky. You repeat too much. I have struck out unnecessary verbiage and underlined some problems. Please correct them and post your revised text here.
In recent years, with the improvement of people’s living standard , some people form a habit of raising small or domestic animals as their pets. Some raise fishes or birds as their pet
In recent years, with the improvement of people’s living standard , some people form a habit of raising small or domestic animals as their pets. Some raise fishes or birds
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