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Anonymous Posted 11 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please help me correct my toefl essay

Hello everyone,
Could someone please help me with my essay and maybe mark it ? I don't know what I should improve and I'm willing to pass the toefl ibt test in few days. Thank you very much.
Sincerly yours, Lilo.

Each individual who became a leader brought important changes to his country or to the world which are still nowadays remembered. In my opinion, first president of the fifth french republic Charles de Gaule has been one of the most important world leader, and this for several reasons.

On the one hand, De Gaule contributed to put an end to the Nazi domination in the french territory during the Vichy Republic which lasted between 1940 and 1944. Ever since, General de Gaule has been considered as a national hero by the majority of french citizens. First of all, he is remembered for what is called "the call of June 18 th 1940". He delivered a speech which was broadcasted on the BBC radio to urge french citizens not to give up in front of the Nazi. This event helpt cheer up people and many resistance movements were hence created. In addition to that, while de Gaule was living in Great Britain, he created a real army which was called "release forces" which goal was to deliver weapons to the French. With all his efforts, General de Gaule led french people to reconquere their former territory.

On the other hand, after the end of the Nazi domination, General de Gaule instaured the fifth french republic. He was the first president of this new regime which is a memorable event. He decided to make political changes, and gave more power to the president. He also enacted several social laws, giving the right to vote to women and creating the "Social Security", a social aid institution in 1947.

In a nutshell, General de Gaule is clearly one world leader that must be remembered for all his contributions to France. He enabled his country to free herself from the fascism and instaured a regime which is still working nowadays.
  

Top answer

Anonymous Each individual who became a leader brought important changes to his country Each individual who became a leader brought important changes to their country Anonymous or to the world which are still nowadays remembered. or to the world which are still remembered. Anonymous In my opinion, first president of the fifth french republic In my opinion, the first president of the fifth French republic Anonymous Charles de Gaule has been one of the most important world leader , Charles de Gaule has been one of the most important world leaders , Anonymous and this for several reasons.

  • Anonymous Each individual who became a leader brought important changes to his country Each individual who became a leader brought important changes to their country Anonymous or to the world which are still nowadays remembered.
  • or to the world which are still remembered.
  • Anonymous In my opinion, first president of the fifth french republic In my opinion, the first president of the fifth French republic Anonymous Charles de Gaule has been one of the most important world leader , Charles de Gaule has been one of the most important world leaders , Anonymous and this for several reasons.
  • and this is for several reasons.
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1 Answers
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AnonymousEach individual who became a leader brought important changes to his country
Each individual who became a leader brought important changes to their country
Anonymousor to the world which are still nowadays remembered.
or to the world which are still re

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