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Đỗ Thị Nghị Posted 6 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please help me correct my ielts writing task 2

Topic: People should follow the customs and traditions when people start to live in a new country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Recently, foreigners should adapt to the local customs and traditions when they come to reside in a new country have been receiving a great deal of public attention. I completely agree with that view.

It is difficult to newcomers if they do not conform the norms of social behaviors in the new countries. First, if they do not accept the local customs and traditions, it is impossible to blend into their new environment. This mean that, the immigrants could not understand the way of life of the residents, such as foods, habits, which leads to they feel like they are isolated to society. Second, by not conforming the norms of social behavior, they might fall foul of the law and make the local people angry . For example, in philipines, the “like” icon means that you are kidding and joking the local people, which results in fighting the locals and immigrants.

There are also many benefits when foreigners do adapt the customs and traditions of new countries. First, by establishing a closer link with the host community, they could get greater integration and mutual understanding. This means that, if the newcomers show respect to the host’s way of life, the will be more welcoming them, which leads to the immigrants are able to make more friends and easier to blend into community. Sencond, since the richness of the experience which the newcomers gain from enjoying local customs and traditions, enabling them take part in community life and avoid social isolation. For instance, during the national holidays and festivals, they will feel like they “belong” into their new countries .

In conclusion, I argue that it is essential for new residents to follow the customs and traditions in the host country in order to integrate fully into new society.

  

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3 Answers
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Please post essays, paragraphs, dialogues and other writing in the essay forum so a moderator does not have to move your post.

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Ð? Th? Ngh? have been receiving a great deal of public attention.

You have memorized this to use in Task 2 essays.
Memorized answers will not get you a good score.


Besides, the statement is not true. I have never heard this being discussed in public.

Study the essay instructions and write an opening sentence that is individual

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You are relying too much on memorized phrases and sentences. Also, many of the sentences are not grammatical and the usage of vocabulary is not good.

This task is very difficult for someone at your skill level. You need to practice writing simple sentences. You need to study vocabulary words more. You need to read a lot of English text written by native speakers.
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