Please help me correct my grammar, sentences, ideas,,, Is it alright for a writing task 1?

http://ieltstime.blogspot.com/2012/05/sample-answer-ielts-writing-task-1-bar_08.html

The bar chart illustrates the expenditures for a list of six consumer goods in four different nations namely Germany, Italy, France and Britain.

Overall, the expenses of Germany were quite similar among each of goods while that of four other countries flutuated. British saw the highest spending on all of items among four countries.

In particular, British spent the highest sum of money than any other countries in terms of all six categories. Especially, they spent the largest budget on Photographic film, at over 170 thousand, by contrast, Personal stereos and Tennis racquets accounted for the lowest amount of money, at samely 155 thousand. It is noticeable that the expenditure of Germany was nearly unchanged in six goods, at around 145 thousand.

Italy spent their money in Personal stereos, Tennis racquets and Perfumes higher than France while France’s spending was higher in CDs and Photographic film. In addition, the figure for expense on Toys was the same between both countries, at nearly 160 thousand