Please help me checking the errors in Task 2 Ielts

Q: Some people said that giving aid to poorer countries has more negative effects than positive effects, to what extend do you agree or disagree ?

Answer:

In the last decade, the international aid for the developing countries plays an important role in those economies. From my point of view, I totally disagree with that it brings drawbacks more than advantages.

On the one hand, there are a variety of negative effects toward low-level nations through developed countries’ supports. Firstly, in terms of financial aid, it may make poorer countries are more and more dependent on developed countries. When Government receives the financial support, they easily use it into inefficient purposes until those funds are exhausted, they will need the further aid. Secondly, the foreign aid will be meaningless, if it goes into the corrupt hands and not reach those for whom it was meant for. For instance, the corrupt government will not spend that money for investing the meaningful projects or helping poor people, because they only think concerning their benefits.

On the other hand, the advantages of the rich countries supporting the poorer are obvious. One reason is that the poorer nations will gain the positive changes in regard to not only infrastructure but also scientific and technological level. To be specific, the construction of schools and hospitals which involve local people will help them having a better life. In addition, the low-level countries have countless opportunities to obtain the international projects in many fields, particularly in education. Take many students in Asia who had the good academic achievements as an example, thanks to the global scholarship from the rich nations, they reached the golden chances to study abroad, and then they will come back to their countries to apply this sort of knowledge to enrich those countries.

In conclusion, I do not believe that the developed nations receive aids from developed countries will gain more negative issues compared to positive issues.