Please help me check this ielts task 1! Thanks a lot
II/ The table below shows the worldwide market share of the notebook computer market for manufacturers in the years 2006 and 2007.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Company | 2006 % Market Share | 2007 % Market Share |
HP | 31.4 | 34 |
Dell | 16.6 | 20.2 |
Acer | 11.6 | 10.7 |
Toshiba | 6.2 | 7.3 |
Lenovo | 6.6 | 6.2 |
Fujitsu-Siemens | 4.8 | 2.3 |
Others | 22.8 | 19.3 |
Total | 100 | 100 |
The table gives us data about the market share of the note book computer for producers in the world in 2006 and 2007. There are some clear differences between these two years situations.
As the table reported, the highest notebook market share over two years was belonged to HP company, reported as 31.4 percent and 34 percent in 2006 and 2007, respectively. Subsequently, the second rank is named by Dell manufacturer, which was as half amount of share as the HP. The trend of the share of two companies above was tend to increase, so did the case of Toshiba. However, in the other side, some lower ranking companies such as Acer, Lenovo and Fujitsu-Siemens had number of market share decreased slightly. For Acer, the percentage reduced from 11.6 to 10.7 percent, 6.6 to 6.2 for Lenovo and 4.8 to 2.3 to Fujitsu. In 2006, other companies which are apart from this table, took 22.8 percent of market share, but this number lessened in 2007 with 19.3 percent.
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Here are my suggestions: The table gives us data about the market share of the notebook computer s for held by different producers in the world in 2006 and 2007. There are some clear differences changes from one year to the next between these two years situations . 4 percent and 34 percent in 2006 and 2007, respectively.
- Here are my suggestions: The table gives us data about the market share of the notebook computer s for held by different producers in the world in 2006 and 2007.
- There are some clear differences changes from one year to the next between these two years situations .
- 4 percent and 34 percent in 2006 and 2007, respectively.
- Subsequently, the second rank is named was held by Dell manufacturer, whose share in 2006 was about half the size of HP's .
- which was as half amount of share as the HP .
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Here are my suggestions:
The table gives us data about the market share of the notebook computers for held by different producers in the world in 2006 and 2007. There are some clear differences changes from one year to the next between these two years situations. [OR you could have borrowed the language of
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