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10:48 amSome people argue that technological inventions, such as mobile phones, are making people socially less interactive. Do you agree or disagree?Nowadays, everything has its two sides --- positive and negative. Though technological inventions have their benefits. However, mobile phones have adverse effects too. I strongly agree with the latter view due to several reasons that I will discuss in greater detail in my essay.To begin with, Hectic life and these technological inventions such as mobile phones and social media have affected almost each and every aspect of our life. Communication skills are no exception. Before the advent of the social media revolution. Children would often hang out in the evening and play together for hours. While playing they would often converse with one another in thousands of ways, using different words and structures. This improved their conversation skills. However, the advent of social media has affected the social interaction of not only the children but the grown-ups and adults also. Social media and networking sites such as Facebook and Twitter, Instagram, Youtube, and many more have become a source of major distractions for everyone. They seem to have become inordinately addicted to these sites. Even when they are sitting close to each other in the drawing-room or dining room, they are looking at the screen of their mobile phonesOn the other hand, people are thoughtlessly and uselessly wasting their precious time on these sites. Wise people said that time well utilized is time well spent, but the youth of today is only and only wasting time on chatting, messaging, uploading photographs and modifying profiles. Smartphones and 4G connections have made the situation worse. Accessing such sites has become so easy that young boys and girls are using these sites almost everywhere and almost all the time.In conclusion, there could be many perspectives to view any subject. In my opinion, technological inventions such as mobile phones have reduced the gaps and connect humans more closely with each other like never before.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

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AlpheccaStars · Answer

Nowadays, everything has its two sides --- positive and negative. (That is not a good opening sentence. It is too general and it has nothing to do with the topic.)

~~Though~~ t Technological inventions have their benefits. However, mobile phones have adverse effects too. I strongly agree with the latter view (You are not asked to agree with views that you invent. Agree or disagree with the topic statement.) ~~due to several reasons that I will discuss in greater detail in my essay~~.

That is not a good thesis statement. Do not mention your essay. Do not announce to the reader what you are going to write. It is very bad style. Also you did not answer the essay question clearly and you were not on topic.

Here is the topic: mobile phones are making people socially less interactive.

Here is an example topic statement:

e.g.

I agree, from personal experience, that people do not have as many high-quality face-to-face interactions as as they did before smart phones and social media sites became widespread. This has caused people to be more isolated, focused on their phones instead of other people.

In your first paragraph you need to talk about social interaction. Otherwise you lose a lot of points for "task completion."

To begin with, Hectic life and these technological inventions such as mobile phones and social media have affected almost each and every aspect of our life. Communication skills (That is not an aspect of our life. Examples are school, work, shopping, preparing meals and commuting.) are no exception. Before the advent of the social media revolution. (Fragment, not a sentence. "Advent of" is not a good expression.) ) Children would often hang out in the evening and play together for hours. While playing they would often converse with one another in thousands of ways, and exchange many ideas and opinions. ~~using different words~~ ~~and structures~~. This improved their conversation skills. (Off topic, the topic is not conversation skills) However, ~~the advent of~~ the use of social media has affected the social interaction of not only the children but the ~~grown-ups and~~ (redundant. Grown-ups and adults are the same thing.) adults also. Social media and networking sites such as Facebook and Twitter, Instagram, Youtube, and many more have become a source of major distractions for everyone. ~~They~~ Their users seem to have become inordinately addicted to these sites. Even when they are sitting close to each other in the drawing-room or dining room, they are looking at the screen of their mobile phones (missing punctuation)

On the other hand, (incorrect use of transition phrase ) people are thoughtlessly and uselessly wasting their precious time on these sites. Wise people said that time well utilized is time well spent, (Off topic. You should give a personal experience that relates to the topic. Avoid these sayings.) but the youth of today is only and only wasting time on chatting, messaging, uploading photographs and modifying profiles. Smartphones and 4G connections have made the situation worse. Accessing such sites has become so easy that young boys and girls are using these sites almost everywhere and almost all the time.

In conclusion, there could be many perspectives to view any subject. (off-topic, too general.) In my opinion, technological inventions such as mobile phones have reduced the gaps and connect humans more closely with each other like never before. (You took the opposite opinion in your conclusion than you did in the beginning. If you change your opinion in the middle of the essay, you will lose a lot of points. Most of your essay is rambling off topic. You did not focus on the topic.)

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