Please help corret the grammer mistakes in the short essay

Question

0Hi all. Could you please help me to correct the grammers mistakes in the following essay. It is really difficult for myself to find out the mistakes. Thank you very much for your kind help. Also it would be wonderful  if anyone could offer any new idears on the argument: should universities provide more money for libraries or sport facilities? 02br02br00Libraries, as the traditional facility, in universities play an essential role in education system. However, could you imagine how dull a campus will be without sports facilities? It is hard for universities to decide how to allocate the limited budget on libraries and sport facilities. 02br02br02br02br00It goes without doubt that libraries are of crucial importance to assist students searching for the relevant studying material. Universities, where have a lot of professors, could know clearly what books are useful for students, especially in the specialty areas. On the contrary, students may waste a lot of time to looking for the books which are of little value to their study. At this point, universities have the responsibilities to provide libraries with abundant resource to assist students in academic study. A good library with its large collection of books is always the pride and symbol of prominent university. 02br02br02br02br00However, it is generally accepted that students could not be developed comprehensively if they just focus on study, and ignore the physical exercises. A well-equipped should be full of sports facilities. It is known to all that exercise can keep people healthy and decrease the risks of developing diseases. Moreover, students could obtain a great fun from the sports. For example, they could make new friends and enhance their social activities during the exercises. Also, if they feel they are strong and powerful, they could see themselves in a better light. 02br02br02br02br00Both libraries and sports facilities are indispensable for universities. In my opinion, however, universities, as the primary education source, should give priority to invest in libraries rather than sport facilities. Of course universities should also spent money on expanding sport facilities if there are enough funds. 0-

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

0Nobody do me a favour? I am waiting for your help. Please give me a hand, thanks so much. 02br
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00-Maria0-

Pixie85 · Answer

0Libraries, as a traditional facility in universities, play an essential role in education system. Could you imagine how dull a campus would be without sports facilities? It is hard for universities to decide how to allocate the limited budget on libraries and sport facilities. 02br
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00It goes without doubt that libraries are of crucial importance to assist students searching for the relevant studying material. 00Universities, where have a lot of professors, could know clearly what books are useful for students, especially in the specialty areas.00 --> 01font00(what do u mean by this sentence?)02font00 On the contrary, students may waste a lot of time looking for the books that are of little value to their study. At this point, universities have the responsibility to provide libraries with adequate resources to assist students in academic study. A good library, with its large collection of books, is always a pride and symbol of any prominent university. 02br
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00However, it is generally accepted that students could not develop into well-rounded individuals if they just focus on their studies, while ignoring physical activieties. A well-equipped university should also have sports facilities. It is known to all that exercise can keep people healthy and decreases the risks of developing diseases. Moreover, students could obtain great fun from the sports. For example, they could make new friends and enhance their social activities during the exercises. Also, if they feel they are strong and powerful, they could see themselves in a better light. 02br
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00Both libraries and sports facilities are indispensable for universities. In my opinion, however, universities, as the primary education source, should invest primarily in libraries rather than sport facilities. Of course universities should also spent money on expanding sport facilities if there are enough funds. 02br
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01font00hi! i hope this one helps. i didn't change much of your words because i don't want the essay to lose the meaning that you intended to deliver. there is only one sentence that is quite unclear to me (the highlighted sentence). i hope you can clarify that. otherwise, your essay is pretty good. 05002font010id1

Anonymous · Answer

0This is my take on your essay. Please just note them.02br
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01i00__________________________02i02br
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00Libraries, as a traditional facility in universities, play an essential role in the educational system. However, could you imagine how dull a campus would be without sports facilities? It is hard for university boards to decide how to allocate their limited budget on libraries and sports facilities. 02br
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00It goes without doubt that libraries are of crucial importance in assisting students in searching for relevant studying materials. Universities, which have a lot of professors, could know clearly what books are useful for students. On the contrary, students may waste a lot of time looking for the books that are of little value to their study. At this point, universities have the responsibility to provide libraries with abundant and up-to-date resources. A good library with a large collection of books is always the pride and symbol of prominent university.02br
02br
00However, it is generally accepted that students could not be developed holistically if they just focus on studying and ignore physical exercises. A well-equipped university should have adequate sports facilities. It is known to all that exercise can keep people healthy and decrease the risks of developing diseases. Moreover, students could obtain great fun from sports. They could even make new friends and enhance their social activities during exercises. Also, if they feel good about their physical selves, they can carry this disposition in their academic work.02br
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00Both libraries and sports facilities are indispensable. In my opinion, however, universities, as the primary education source, should give priority to invest in libraries rather than sport facilities. Of course universities should also spent money on expanding sport facilities if there are enough funds.02br
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01i00__________________________02i02br
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00Other points:02br
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001. I feel the discussion on libraries showed its good and bad side - that libraries are useful only if there are good kinds of books there. On the other hand, the discussion on sports facilities only showed its good side. I think you can have a better discussion if you state the pros and cons of both the libraries and the sports facilities.02br
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002. It will be better if you state your university as an example. That will make the article more grounded. for example, in our school here in the Philippines, our library was renovated in 1997, but the sports facilities (covered courts) was built around 1998-1999 (I'm not quite sure with the years; it is roughly accurate). This means that the school prioritized libraries over sports facilities. But there is a deeper reason for that. Our school expanded its roster of courses, and therefore library facilities needed to be updated first. It is important to do that because new courses need different sets of books. These kinds of examples will make your argument clearer.02br
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003. Expand your conclusion. It's a bit hanging to end it in a very short manner. State at least three reasons why it is better to prioritize libraries over sports facilities. Then, explain them.02br
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00I hope this is of help.02br
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00Biboy Calleja0-

Mariasun · Answer

0 01font01b00Hi,02b00 01b01font00Pixie85 and Biboy02font00, thanks so much. Your advises do help me a lot. I am really touched by your generous help. As strangers, you guys offered me such unconditional assitance. Please accept my most cordial thanks for your timely help again.02b00 02font00 0-

Please help corret the grammer mistakes in the short essay

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