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Anonymous Posted 13 years ago
Grammar

Please help correct paragraph

I need to explain this, could you help me make it nice?

When the Los Angeles Lakers face off against the Los Angeles Clippers on the Clippers home-court. The only thing the that changes is the court's design and logo. Other than that, they both play in the same arena. Even if it's a Clipper home game, half the fans present are for the Lakers. Both teams play each other twice, each on their home-court once for on paper. On paper, each team is at home once. It is just a nuance. Both times, both teams will be on their home-court but with the other teams court design.

Thanks
  

Top answer

IN A Los Angeles Lakers versus Los Angeles Clippers face-off* on the LATTER'S home-court, the only thing the that changes is the court's design and logo. Other than that, they both play in the same arena. Even if it's a Clipper home game, half the fans present SUPPORT the Lakers.

  • IN A Los Angeles Lakers versus Los Angeles Clippers face-off* on the LATTER'S home-court, the only thing the that changes is the court's design and logo.
  • Other than that, they both play in the same arena.
  • Even if it's a Clipper home game, half the fans present SUPPORT the Lakers.
  • Both teams play AGAINST each other twice ON THE SAME COURT, BUT ON PAPER, each team plays on their home-court ONLY ONCE.
  • It is just a nuance,BUT IN ACTUALITY, both times, both teams will be on their home-court but with the other teams court design.
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3 Answers
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IN A Los Angeles Lakers versus Los Angeles Clippers face-off* on the LATTER'S home-court, the only thing the that changes is the court's design and logo. Other than that, they both play in the same arena. Even if it's a Clipper home game, half the fans present SUPPORT the Lakers. Both teams play AGAINST each other twice ON THE SAME COURT, BUT ON PAPER, each team plays on their home-co
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It seems very wordy.

The Los Angles Lakers and the Los Angeles Clippers share the same arena as their home court. They play each other twice a year. Technically, it's the home court for one of the teams each time, but in reality, the only thing that changes is the court design and logo. The fans will still be split evenly.
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Agreed, it's too wordy indeed, I wrote it that way because I didn't want to remove any of the the author's sentences and push my correction too far. Anyway, your version seems far superior

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