Please help - application letter for secondary school

Hi,

Unless your daughter writes the letter herself, you should write as a parent. It's more honest.

MountainHiker

thanks a lot.

Then is it better to wirte the application letter herself or I write it as a parent?

That would depend upon the school's policy. Ask them to explain the admission process to you.

Here is the draft of the application letter. Would you please give me some comments and make corrections? Thanks so much for your kind help.

I am a parent who is seeking an open and lively learning environment for my daughter in order for her to achieve a balanced development in academic, moral, physical and artistic qualities, as well as to nurture the values of love, goodness and trut

Jessmac,

Be sure to thank Howard Cheung for providing some initial thoughts.

The one paragraph that concerns me slightly is the following:

In addition to academic achievement, we have provided opportunities for *** to better develop her other abilities and talents. She has participated in various extra-curricular activities including arts classes, music events

First, I would like to thank MountainHiker for your great help and Mr H Cheung for providing the skeleton of the letter.

Here is the modified one: (with the changes in [ ] ) [How can i use bold or italic or different colours here?? I m too stupid about this]

Since 1999, *** has been studying at *** Primary School. It has well equipped her with strong academic background, and

Jessmac,

bold (remove spaces)
underline (remove spaces)
italics (remove spaces)
quoted stuff (remove spaces)

Since 1999, *** has been studying at *** Primary School. It has well equipped her with strong academic background, and developed her moral values and artistic qualities. She attained good grades in [different] subjec

MountainHiker,

Thank you very much for your great help. I really learn a lot from you. You are very helpful and generous.

Would you mind telling me where you are from? I'm from Hong Kong, I learn English as my second language. After I reached a certain standard, I find it hard to improve. Or it takes much more effort to improve a bit, haha.

Thanks again for your help

Jessmac,

I am glad you are happy with your letter.

I am from western Canada. I know English and a little Spanish and definitely no Chinese languages. My tiny bean would have too much difficulty with learning something that appears so complex. So I have great admiration for those who can learn both languages. I think there are a few regulars from Hong Kong that frequent our

Jessmac,

In addition to academic achievement, we have provided opportunities for *** to better develop her other abilities and talents. She has participated in various extra-curricular activities including arts classes, musical events and [an] English drama club. Her talents are well recognized [as evidenced] by the awards she obtained. [You could also write this more acti