Please give me some feedbacks about my essay.

In the age of technological advancement, Facebook is rapidly dominating the entire time spent of our lives as a result of remarkable benefits. An important controversy centring on how Facebook minute by minute becoming indispensable concerns potential threats put on our lives. In my perspective, I wholeheartedly agree that Facebook brings out several negative impacts besides noticeably positive factors.

First and foremost, Facebook enhances the high risk of personal information invasion. In reality, there are many instances of infringement of privacy, such as location information, relationship, bank account, etc., due to the poor security of Facebook. As a result, this unacceptable act can drive a human into anxiety disorder or depression, thus harming their health, not to mention the risk of financial loss.

Secondly, Facebook drives people to be inactive and isolate themselves in their own homes every time they are free. As far as I am aware, people use Facebook at least 8 hours per day, so most of us are riveted on Facebook chatting, watching funny videos without concerning the time spent. Worryingly, this can lead people to be more isolated and suffer both physical health problems related to eyes, bones and mental disorders such as depression. According to recent research, children increasingly have difficulty in communication because of overusing Facebook.

In contrast, some may argue that if we are not using Facebook 24/24, we can not keep up to date with news on the world. I concede that Facebook keeps us informed of the rapid changes in the world. However, using it all day long can bring about detrimental effects on mental abilities and working capacity. As we have our eyes glued on Facebook all day, many distractors can interrupt our attention span and we hardly catch up with working or studying tasks.

In conclusion, I am convinced that it is true that Facebook inflicts so much harm on our lives. The low security of Facebook can enable hackers or intruders to violate our personal information. Besides, Facebook can lead us to isolated lives and reduce mental abilities and working capacity as well.