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Hoanghank Posted 4 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please give me some feedback on my IELTS writing task 1; I welcome all constructive feedback. Thanks a lot.

For my first mistake, I don't understand why you wrote "60% of first-time mother ..." that's why I tried to change it. And for the other two, I tried to make my sentence succinct and assumed that people would understand. How can you make a sentence succinct and comprehensible ?

  

Top answer

" I wrote that because that is what the diagram says! hoanghank that's why I tried to change it. You rephrased it, but the meaning is still wrong!

— Teechr

  • " I wrote that because that is what the diagram says!
  • hoanghank that's why I tried to change it.
  • You rephrased it, but the meaning is still wrong!
  • You are still misinterpreting what it is saying.
  • It is not saying that 60% of ALL Australian women 19-24 years of age became first-time mothers!
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1 Answers
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hoanghankFor my first mistake, I don't understand why you wrote "60% of first-time mothers ..."

I wrote that because that is what the diagram says!

hoanghankthat's why I tried to change it.

You rephrased it, but the meaning is still wrong! You are still misinterpreting wha

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