0
Panda car 480 Posted 5 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please give me some feedback and advice about my writing

More people put their personal information online (address, telephone number,) for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Because of daily activities including banking purposes and socializing with people on social networks, there is more personal information put online by people. In my opinion, I strongly believe that this development leads to negative effects.

On the one hand, there are several reasons why I think that this trend is a negative development. Firstly, people are prone to telephone and messenger harassment from strangers. This is because, if people advertently share their personal information on social media, strangers will easily gather their information. Consequently, the strangers use the information to continually call or message them to convince them into doing what the strangers want. Take my brother, who used to often put his information on Facebook to play games, as an example. Due to making his information known on Facebook, he received a mountain of messengers and emails sent by game providers and sellers tempting him to purchases their latest game products.

Secondly, putting personal information can cause people to be involved in crimes perpetrated by other people. In order to commit a crime, criminals normally use fake and inaccurate information to avoid being tracked by police. They can use people’s information put online to do crimes, leading people to have trouble. This can be best evidenced by my uncle. In 2015, he was arrested for drug-related offence. After 5 years of conducting an investigation, police found that there was one criminal using his information on Twitter by him to perpetrate the crime, making him serve a life sentence for the crime he did not commit.

In conclusion, I highly suggest that putting personal information online is a negative development.

  

Top answer

Please post essays, paragraphs, dialogues and other writing in the essay forum so a moderator does not have to move your post.

  • Please post essays, paragraphs, dialogues and other writing in the essay forum so a moderator does not have to move your post.
Free · every Monday

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬

New words, one handy idiom, and a 2-minute quiz — delivered to your inbox to keep your streak alive.

2 Answers
0


Please post essays, paragraphs, dialogues and other writing in the essay forum so a moderator does not have to move your post.

0

Because of daily activities including banking purposes (A purpose is not an activity.) and socializing with people on social networks, there is more personal information put online by people. In my opinion, I strongly believe that this development leads to negative consequences. effects.

Related Questions