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Hungry Posted 19 years ago
Grammar

Please edit my answers

1i01font01b00Hi, Could someone please please please have a through look at the answers for grammar mistakes, and weird lines, and edit them?02b02font02i02br
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01i01font01b00I will be so nice of you.02b02font02i02br
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01i01font01b00Thanks in anticipation.02b02font02i02br
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00Children Henry Wadsworth Longfellow02br
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00Come to me, O ye children!02br
00For I hear you at your play,02br
00And the questions that perplexed me02br
00Have vanished quite away.02br
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00Ye open the eastern windows,02br
00That look towards the sun,02br
00Where thoughts are singing swallows02br
00And the brooks of morning run.02br
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00In your hearts are the birds and the sunshine,02br
00In your thoughts the brooklet's flow,02br
00But in mine is the wind of Autumn02br
00And the first fall of the snow.02br
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00Ah! what would the world be to us02br
00If the children were no more?02br
00We should dread the desert behind us02br
00Worse than the dark before.02br
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00What the leaves are to the forest,02br
00With light and air for food,02br
00Ere their sweet and tender juices02br
00Have been hardened into wood, --02br
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00That to the world are children;02br
00Through them it feels the glow02br
00Of a brighter and sunnier climate02br
00Than reaches the trunks below.02br
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00Come to me, O ye children!02br
00And whisper in my ear02br
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00What the birds and the winds are singing02br
00In your sunny atmosphere.02br
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00For what are all our contrivings,02br
00And the wisdom of our books,02br
00When compared with your caresses,02br
00And the gladness of your looks?02br
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00Ye are better than all the ballads02br
00That ever were sung or said;02br
00For ye are living poems,02br
00And all the rest are dead.02br
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01b001.00 02b00What are the children doing?02br
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00They are playing.02br
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01b002.00 02b00What is the question that is disturbing the poet?02br
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00What would life be like without the innocence of children?02br
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01b003.00 02b00How has the question been answered?02br
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00It's been answered by the sound of the soft and sweet voices of the children.02br
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01b004.00 02b00What does the poet mean by saying that the children open the windows that look to the east?02br
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00It's children that make the sun rise and show its brightness to the world.02br
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01b005.00 02b00To what does the poet compare the thoughts?02br
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00He compares the thoughts to singing swallows.02br
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01b006.00 02b00Why does he compare them so?02br
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00He compares them because children's thoughts are as innocent and nonchalant as the singing birds, which soar carelessly in the sky at dawn and give a beautiful picture of tranquility.02br
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01b007.00 02b00How can the birds and the sunshine be in the hearts of the children? What does the poet mean?02br
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00He means children are generally carefree, like the birds which glide high in the sky, away from the cares in the world, droning soft and mellow tunes. Children speak their hearts, and their hearts are as pure and radiant as the Sunshine.02br
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01b008.00 02b00The poet says that the children are thinking of the brooks while he is thinking of autumn. What does this mean?02br
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00The poet says so, because he has grown old and feeble, and his life is about to end like a plant that gets dried out in Autumn, while the children are young, energetic and lively like running brooks.02br
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01b009.00 02b00Is the poet using the word autumn for old age?02br
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00Yes, he is using it to describe time of late maturity. 02br
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01b0010.00 02b00What other words does the poet use to show the coming of old age upon him?02br
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00First fall of the snow02br
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01b0011.00 02b00How are the children different from the poet?02br
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00The children differ from the poet in many aspects. Their thoughts are as innocent and nonchalant as the singing birds, which glide carelessly in the sky at dawn, droning soft and mellow tunes. In their hearts "are the birds and the sunshine”, and in their thoughts "the brooklet's flow”, while the poet is seized in the hands of trouble, and in his heart and thoughts “is the wind of Autumn, and the first fall of the snow.” And most importantly, he has grown old and fragile, it has taken almost all his lifetime to make his fortune, whereas the children are young and bouncy, and it’s just the beginning of their journey.02br
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01b0012.00 02b00What question does the poet ask?02br
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00What would life be like without the children and their innocence? 02br
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01b0013.00 02b00In the third and fourth lines of the 401sup00th02sup00 stanza, the poet says if there were no children, we would fear the desert behind us, and more than that we would fear the dark in front of us. What do the desert and the dark mean? 02br
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00Desert is the past, dark the future. The term desert actually refers to a world devoid of gaiety and cheerfulness, and the dark signifies the atmosphere which would be very dreadful and gloomy without children.02br
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01b0014.00 02b00What would happen to the trees if there were no leaves?02br
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00They would harden into woods.02br
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01b0015.00 02b00What would happen to us, if there were no children? 02br
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00We would have no hope, life would be depressing, pointless.02br
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01b0016.00 02b00Why does the poet ask the children to come to him?02br
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00He calls them to whisper to him.02br
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01b0017.00 02b00What songs does the poet wish to be whispered in the ear?02br
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00Tell him what the birds and winds are singing.02br
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01b0018.00 02b00To what does the poet compare children?02br
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00He compares them to ballads and poems.02br
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01b0019.00 02b00How can the children be like the ballads and the poems?02br
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00They can be like the ballads and the poems for they are full of emotions, feelings, energy and music.02br
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01b0020.00 02b00The poet calls the children living and the rest all dead. Why does he say this?02br
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00He says this, because we have lost our innocence. 02br
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01b0021.00 02b00The grown up people have wisdom and books. What do the children have?02br
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00They have innocence, emotions of love and affection, pleasure and self-contentment.0-
  

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050010id6

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39 Answers
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0No reply!!050010id6
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0Hi, they look mostly ok to me, but of course I don't know what answers your teacher is expecting.02br
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00I'd take another look at 13. though, there is a deeper meaning there that you have missed. Think about deserts as barren places, and the ultimate darkness is ...?0-
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0Thanks NTB! 02br
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00I feel that my answers sound a bit odd. They are just OK. not up to very good. I think that I failed in getting glibness, and beauty of words, which a native English speaker could do. I mean if a native English speaker had to answer the questions, would he answer the same way I did? Apart from that I have some grammar perplexities. I have parenthesize
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1b001.00 02b00What are the children doing?02br
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00They are playing.02br
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01b002.00 02b00What is the question that is disturbing the poet?02br
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00What would life be like without the innocence of children?02br
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01b003.00 02b00How has t
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After spending weeks on the answers, I feel they are not quite right, and don’t sparkle. I am not sure if grammar, sentence structure, flow, punctuation, mood and tense are presented in a manner that makes sense.
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I am looking at this because you asked me to, but I am terrible at poetry interpretation.

I still think that #13 isn't quite right - deserts are baren and lifeless, and the dark is coming death.

When we wants them to whisper in his ear, he wants to be reminded of what it feels like to be young and carefree. He's not asking for a literal interpretation, but for them to s
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Hello H.,

It needs a little more work, as you suspected. Here are my thoughts on the grammar:

3. How has the question been answered?

It's been answered by the sound of the soft and sweet voices of the children.

— I would say "It has been", rather than "It's been", as the register elsewhere is formal.

4. What does the poet mean by saying that the
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PS: I'm not sure what kind of swallow Longfellow was thinking of, when he wrote the poem.

But you may want to look at this description of Hirundo rustica, the barn swallow:

http://www.rspb.org.uk/birds/guide/s/swa
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Hi again,
I see that since we chatted in the chat room, you have gotten answers from Mr. P that are far better than I could have given you. My advice would be "Always take Mr. P's advice."
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Oh! It's so nice of both of you. I am so grateful to you that I can't express thanks in words. Well, let me give it a go!Emotion: smile

M
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