please correct my paragraph

Question

Who has the Greatest freedom. Orwell or the Burmese?

George Orwell is a police officer and this may give you the idea that he has freedom more than the Burmese people that he lived with, but obviously he doesn’t. He wasn’t free to do what he wanted, he did what white men always do, even if he didn’t believe in the things they did. He hated the British imperialism, but still he did nothing that shows disagreement with the imperialism, this show that he wasn’t free. Because he was a police officer he had to decide what do about the elephant and at last he shot it, but not because he wanted, it was just to show that white men are strong, he said “A white man mustn't be frightened in front of natives", this shows that before he takes an action he thinks of others and not what he really wants to do. He didn’t do what he thought that is right, because he decided to watch the elephant and if it wasn’t dangerous he won’t shoot it, but then he shot it and of course he did it because he thought of other things other than deciding to take the right decision of his own. Burmese are free because they don’t have rules and they showed their freedom in different ways as they always attacked British people and did whatever they want.

(edited for formatting purpose)

Julielai · Accepted Answer

Hi,

You have some tense inconsistencies. Also, I don't remember anything in "Shooting the Elephant" that supports the ending you come up with.

Orwell's biographers now say this didn't really happen, by the way.

Who has the Greatest freedom. Orwell or the Burmese?

George Orwell is a police officer and this may give you the idea that he has freedom more (order) than the Burmese people that he lived with, but obviously he doesn’t. He wasn’t free to do what he wanted, he did what white men always do, even if he didn’t believe in the things they did. He hated the British imperialism, but still he did nothing that shows disagreement with the imperialism, this show that he wasn’t free. Because he was a police officer he had to decide what to do about the elephant and at last he shot it, but not because he wanted, it was just to show that white men are strong, he said “A white man mustn't be frightened in front of natives", this shows that before he takes an action he thinks of others and not what he really wants to do. He didn’t do what he thought (word deleted) is right, because he decided to watch the elephant and if it wasn’t dangerous he won’t shoot it, but then he shot it and of course he did it because he thought of other things other than deciding to take the right decision of his own. Burmese are free because they don’t have rules and they showed their freedom in different ways as they always attacked British people and did whatever they want.

Anonymous · Answer

How to Combat Vandalism

Currently there are two possible policies to combat vandalism—the crime of destroying or damaging something especially public property deliberately and for no good reason. The first step is informing people about vandals and their characteristics. It can include types of them and statistics of their damages. This can be illustrated by bus vandalism —including sliced seats, badly marred windows, broken hand rails, unsightly graffiti and more – creates fear and a perception of danger which explains that money spend on reconstruction can be otherwise use to restore bus routes and other services that have been cut for lack of funds. The next step is instituting a high profile crackdown on vandalism with forceful prosecutions and stiff penalties upon conviction. Aggressive law enforcement followed by vigorous prosecution will send a strong message that destruction of public property will not be tolerated. It is a crime with fines and/or incarceration.

Anonymous · Answer

0I have a very irresponsible cousin named Carlos. First of all, he is always late. For example, on Thanksgiving Day, the family had planned to gather together for dinner. We told the family to be there by 7:00pm. We also told them that the food was going to be served at 8:00pm. Almost everyone showed up before 7:00pm. There was only one person missing and of course it was Carlos. He comes around 10:00pm.  He gave the family an excuse that of course no one bought. He said that he had a flat tire. Second, he is irresponsible in his job. For instance, on Mondays, he is always late because he likes to go out with his friends during the weekend. Usually, he shows up 10 minutes later to work. Carlos gives his boss a new excuse everyday.  One day, he told his boss that his mom had a car accident and he had to be with her. He laughs while telling me such a lie. Finally, he is irresponsible in the school. He never likes to do homework. Carlos usually comes late to any class but he has always an excuse for his teachers. I think that he enjoys lying. Every day, he has something new to excuse oneself. 0-

Anonymous · Answer

In some people's life you can see very difficult situations that he or she could take some lesseons from them and try to make him or her's future life in the best way,but unfourtuantely some people are not  able to forget their bad experiences and always live in the past.As we know living  in the past time has a very deep effect in our future lives specially in our connection with other peoples .

Anonymous · Answer

i am a student. i would like to improve my english writing.

Anonymous · Answer

Who has the Greatest freedom. Orwell or the Burmese?

George Orwell is a police officer. His job might indicate more control and power over the people with which he lived, but obviously he doesn’t. (How is it obvious? I don't understand. You can clarify this point or elate it.) Though Orwell hated British imperialism, he did not openly rebel against it.

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Suggestions:
- Okay, I am having a difficult time reading your paragraph. I understand what you are trying to say, but you need to express your ideas and thoughts more flowingly. You are assuming that your readers, us, are George Orwell's biographers: but we are not. I did not know he was a police officer and that he had a dilemma with an elephant. Put yourself in the reader's shoes, write so that your audience knows exactly what you're talking about. Don't have us guess your content!

- Expound on things please.

- Some of your sentences are run-on ones. Proofread your work and edit accordingly.

I left the remainder of the paragraph for you to edit yourself. Please write back if you need more help!

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Because he was a police officer he had to decide what do about the elephant and at last he shot it, but not because he wanted, it was just to show that white men are strong, he said “A white man mustn't be frightened in front of natives", this shows that before he takes an action he thinks of others and not what he really wants to do. He didn’t do what he thought that is right, because he decided to watch the elephant and if it wasn’t dangerous he won’t shoot it, but then he shot it and of course he did it because he thought of other things other than deciding to take the right decision of his own. Burmese are free because they don’t have rules and they showed their freedom in different ways as they always attacked British people and did whatever they want.

Anonymous · Answer

I can tale it rained last night because my belt is a sqeeling when I crankk my car so I knew it rained and I cringed when the belt made that noise only it didn't make the noise. The belt didn't stir. I listened. My engine weren't purring. So called this man to tow my car to the garbage.My engine was gone to the pig pin!

Clive · Answer

Hi,

When I look at this last post, it seems to me the kind of thing a native speaker would write if he were trying to seem like an English learner.

Please tell me if I am right or wrong.

Best wishes, Clive

Anonymous · Answer

AD_ANGELWho has the Greatest freedom. Orwell or the Burmese?

George Orwell is a police officer and this may give you the idea that he has freedom more than the Burmese people that he lived with, but obviously he doesn’t. He wasn’t free to do what he wanted, he did what white men always do, even if he didn’t believe in the things they did. He hated the British imperialism, but still he did nothing that shows disagreement with the imperialism, this show that he wasn’t free. Because he was a police officer he had to decide what do about the elephant and at last he shot it, but not because he wanted, it was just to show that white men are strong, he said “A white man mustn't be frightened in front of natives", this shows that before he takes an action he thinks of others and not what he really wants to do. He didn’t do what he thought that is right, because he decided to watch the elephant and if it wasn’t dangerous he won’t shoot it, but then he shot it and of course he did it because he thought of other things other than deciding to take the right decision of his own. Burmese are free because they don’t have rules and they showed their freedom in different ways as they always attacked British people and did whatever they want.

(edited for formatting purpose)

Anonymous · Answer

kindly correct this statement:

RIS system is the right tool to increase the safety level in our plant as per Plant Safety-Road-Map.
Comprehensive data along with Meridium system can assure successful results by little effort and time.

please correct my paragraph

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