Please check my ielts writing task 1: Pie chart comparision

Question

WRITE DESCRIPTION HEREThe pie charts illustrate the percentage distribution of different agricultural products namely meat, grains, dairy and vegetables in the Eastern and Western region of the country.Overall, each area has different concentration concerning the production in agriculture. In addition, the Eastern region has a slighly more even distribution among the products than the Western region does.In the Eastern region, meat accounts for 35 per cent, represent the largest ration among the four product types. In the second place is dairy, which is only 5 percentage point lower compared to that of meat. Vegetables and grain are less popular than the other two with 20 per cent and 15 per cent respectively.As regards the Western area, the lion’s share is held by grains (45 per cent). Similar to the allocation in  the Eastern region, meat also makes up 35 per cent of the total and is the second most focused goods. There is only a minor sector which is constituted by  dairy and vegetables in this part of the country (15 per cent and 15 per cent).

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

The two pie charts ~~illustrate~~ (wrong word) give / plot the percentage distribution of different agricultural products namely meat, grains, dairy and vegetables in the Eastern and Western region of the country.

Overall, each area has

Overall, each area has different concentration concerning the production in agriculture. (unnatural and uninformative) In addition, the Eastern region has a slighly more even distribution among the products than the Western region does.

In the Eastern region, meat accounts for 35 ~~per cent,~~ percent represent the largest ration (wrong word) among the four ~~product~~ types. In the second place is dairy, which is only 5 percentage point (wrong form) lower compared to that of meat. Vegetables and grain are less popular (wrong word. Popular means that people like it. There is no indication of popularity on these charts.) than the other two with 20 ~~per cent~~ percent and 15 per cent respectively.

As regards the Western area, the lion’s share (not appropriate) is held by grains (45 per cent). Similar to the allocation in the Eastern region, meat also makes up 35 per cent of the total and is the second most focused goods. There is only a minor sector which is constituted by dairy and vegetables in this part of the country (15 per cent and 15 per cent). (wrong value)

Sample essay:

The two pie charts, one for the Eastern and the other for the Western region of the country, give the proportions of four classes of agricultural production, meat, grain, vegetables and dairy.

Overall, in the Western Region, half of the production is dedicated to animal products, dairy and meat, and the other half is crops, grain and vegetables. This breakdown contrasts with the Eastern Region, with nearly two-thirds in animal products and one-third in crops. The largest sector in the Western Region, grain, is the smallest in the Eastern Region.

In detail, meat represents the same proportion of production for both regions, 35%. The Western Region concentrates heavily on grain production at 45%, three times higher than the Eastern Region at 15%. The opposite is true for vegetables, accounting for a fifth of the total production in the Eastern Region and only a twentieth in the Western Region. Likewise dairy, is more prevalent in the Eastern Region with 30%, twice that of the Western Region. The smallest segment on these charts is vegetables in the Western Region, at 5%.

Please check my ielts writing task 1: Pie chart comparision

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