Please check my IELTS writing essay please

It is important for people to take risks, in both their professional lives and personal lives.

Do the advantages of taking these risks outweigh the disadvantages?

It is a universal truth that becoming successful in life has become one of the prime objectives for many people in this day and age. Therefore, individuals are incentivized to be take risks both in their jobs and personal lives. Despite the fact that there are some drawbacks that people can encounter, I firmly believe that its downside pales in comparison with its upside.

On the one hand, it is understandable why people are reluctant to take risks. Initially, people will encounter a myriad of hurdles on their journey due to the lack of experience needed to prepare for the obstacles and this effectively leads to bearing other consequences and being in a predicament. Vietnamese youngsters perfectly exemplify this circumstance by virtue of the start-up trend in the country, which encourages them to come out of the safety zone and starting their own businesses. However, this trend has been considered to have drawbacks when a host of businesses have been witnessed to lose thousands of budgets or being in an economic hardship, among other implications. This is a testament to why many individuals are often less inclined to come out of their safety zone

On the other hand, I contend that the advantages of this trend significantly overshadows its downside. It is without doubt that gaining more experience really does wonders for us since taking risks plays a key role in helping us learn the lessons from the mistakes that we make in the previous attempt. Had the CEOs of big enterprises been reluctant to make faults during their progress of becoming rich, they would not be popular and rich now. By the same token, taking risks can help us to become more confident in personal lives, widening the social circle, which can also act a precursor for us to become successful in life as we can stand a chance of learning from others.

In conclusion, notwithstanding the facts that taking risks is not without unpleasant ramifications, I am of the opinion that its advantages is far more significant than its demerits when we look at the big picture