Please check my IELTS essay Task 2. Thank you so much ^^

Topic: Children who are brought up in the family that do not have a lot of money are better prepared to deal with problems when they become adults than the children who are brought up by wealthy parent. Do you agree or disagree with this statement.
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It is believed that youngsters who are raised in the materials family have more problem-solving skills than their counterpart. Nevertheless, some others, see valuabled benefits alongside difficults that merely children raising up in non-materials family receives in their life.

On the one hand, there are some primary reasons why wealthy childrens have a great deal of good conditions contributing to develope their problem-solving ability. First, If people live a family in which have a good financial resource, they will have many opportunities to access to highly quality education system early on. Almost childrens coming from materials families have studied English or other foreign languages since they were in the early years of their life. Therefore, they easily could absorb a large amount of globally valuable knowledges that is necessary to their academic learning as well as career when they become adults. Second, affluent parents could ensure a sustainable future of their childrens in the long run. As these yongsters could also save numerous times and efforts that each people have to spend when they want to run their business.

On the other hand, others see benefetical experiences received from yongsters who grown up in non-materials families. It is a well-known fact that a harsh environment sometimes play an important role in well-rounded children's development. Facing with trouble circumstances in daily life, poor children are able to learn the efficient way to deal with any problems through valuable pragmatic knowledges that people could not receive in the school. In fact, a great number of famous celebrities or billionares in the world like Jack Ma who have a poor childhood, which benefits him with hands-on experiences like management skill. Futhermore, non-materials life encourages each children by motivation that is not many wealth youngsters receives. For instance, Cristiano Rolnado, however he is a best player in the global ten years ago, he still working hard every single day.

In conclusion, both materials or non-materials living have its peaks contributing to the development of each children. However, I tend to believe that if people face with harsh circumstances in advance, they will be well-prepared in dealing with proplem in the long term.