Please check my essay IELTS Writing task 2

Topic:

It's generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for music and sport, and others are not. However, it's sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician.

Discuss both ideas by giving your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

My essay:

Some people think that to become an excellent sportsman or famous musician must have innate talents, while others, including my opinion, argue that anyone also can be a celerity such as professional athletes or performers if they are learned in the right environment and received the best guidance from early age.

On the one hand, a genius one is a person who masters musical instruments or playing sports activities. I agree that a talented person will have more advantages than a normal person for learning and doing their interesting. For example, Gia Khang who is a young musical prodigy in Viet Nam can play the piano well like a professional musician despite of just four years old. He can sense of tone music at early age when listening to melody. Perhaps, he can do that because of inheriting genes from his parents who are also good at instrument musician. Therefore, talented person can perceive the potential themselves which they want to do and feel their own interesting, after then they are taught with professional helps to have success soon rather than others who are not natural gift.

On the other hand, I strong believe that all people can become celerity if they go right direction. In over the world, there are many famous singers that are not all natural abilities. They make hours of daily practice their voice in order to remain the nice voice quality. Another example, Hoang Anh Gia Lai school where children from 5 years old to above are trained skills to become an excellent football player in a long rigorous time by professional coach. According to these quotes, it is a result that anyone can do well in one of any fields when they have right teaching and exert effort day by day.

To sum up, in my view, either are born talents or not, anybody can achieve what they want to become if they try to gain knowledge and experience and do not strong hard work.