0
Cfvg Posted 19 years ago
Letter Writing

please Check grammer the Motivation letter urgent !

I am new nember from Vietnamese, Please check grammer this letter, thank you very much.



I would like to apply for the Master's Degree in MBA program for the period of 2007-2009, provided by xxxx.

I have completed my Bachelor degree in Information Technology Engineering from Posts and Telecommunications Institute of Technology. After completing the Engineering degree's program, I plan to continue my education and the Master's Degree. My objective is to become a faculty member at a leading university and investigate issues concerned with Business Administrations as it affects organizational strategy, management, and operation.

In 2005, I joined Implement Consultant Oracle department on YYY Corporation and I handled ERP solutions Implement consultant, this helped me become familiar with many aspects of the Account-financial system and Management skills. I developed my professional skills by completing several training courses provided by professional institutions, which helped fine-tune my ability to work hard and with sincerity, persistence, motivation, and resilience.

After two years of work, I have become an ERP (Enterprise Resource Planning) project manager of the largest ICT (Information and communication technology) company in . I am responsible for all ERP project, including Assessment, Gap Analysis, and a Phased Implementation in the areas of: Project Organization, Project People, Project Technology, and Project Processes, Project Management, Program Management, and Project Portfolio Management. I learned how to interact with different people and different personalities. I was able to learn creative organizational skills by handling new project. Moreover, on the begin of 2008 I will setup IT services company. Subsequently, my career continued along another challenging path.

To further my career aspirations of becoming CEO, I realize I must learn and study further, by obtaining a master's degree in XXXX. Having this knowledge will allow me to better management skills. With all the uncertainty and changes in the world - political, economic, and technological. I believe that management must have a solid understanding, supported by a strong academic foundation. By learning XXXX, I will be better positioned to understand various aspects of the issues that so many organizations are facing, and to try to generate solutions to complex problems. I believe obtaining a Master's Degree will provide the necessary background to enable me to anticipate and react to ever-changing environments.

I hope that I will be accepted as an applicant and a beneficiary of the MBA Program in the 2007–2009 academic years. I am confident that I am qualified and prepared to meet all the requirements of the scholarship. I would be grateful if you could give my application your most favourable consideration



Thank you for your help.
  

Top answer

Hi, your letter has many flaws: 1. way too long for a covering letter, 2. your motivation isn't clear after all 3.

  • Hi, your letter has many flaws: 1.
  • way too long for a covering letter, 2.
  • your motivation isn't clear after all 3.
  • the letter isn't coherent 4.
  • the letter repeads a bit the information given in the CV.
Free · every Monday

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬

New words, one handy idiom, and a 2-minute quiz — delivered to your inbox to keep your streak alive.

6 Answers
0
Hi,

your letter has many flaws:

1. way too long for a covering letter,

2. your motivation isn't clear after all

3. the letter isn't coherent

4. the letter repeads a bit the information given in the CV. In order to write a good letter you have to pick the points from the CV which fullfil the application criteria

Under this circumstances I have
0
Hi Kathrin,

Thank you for your ideas. Please help me fix this mistakes.

Many thank you.

CFVG
0
Dear all,

I am new nember, Please help me check grammer, special red words .Many thank you.

==


My name is Fu. With this letter I would kindly like to introduce my candidature for The MBA Program at *** starting in the fall of 2007.I have completed my Bachelor degree in Information Technology Engineering from Posts and Telecommun
0
Dear all,

I am new nember, Please help me check grammer, special red words .Many thank you.

==

My name is Fu. With this letter I would kindly like to introduce my candidature for The MBA Program at *** starting in the fall of
0
Hi Kathrin,

Thank you very much for your help, it is really usesful for me.

CFVG
0
Hi Kathrin,

Thank you very much for your help, it is really usesful for me.

CFVG

Related Questions