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Sleepless Posted 15 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Paragraph from an academic dissertation

Could you please help me with the paragraph below?

This is academic text in British English.

I have marked the phrases/words that I am unsure of in capital letters. In addition, I am not sure of punctuation (commas).

"The introduction of the formulation and the relevant elements of this theory as presented by the leading figures of the ‘Realist School’, is followed by sub-chapters that discuss the various types of criticism RAISED ON the approach in general, or certain aspects or even details of it. These debates are STARTEDwith the introduction of the concept of security and the criticism this has AROUSED. I contend that this theory can be used to analyse BOTH social mobilisation, its suppression, and resistance (to the suppression) within the same framework. I posit that A perception of threats, repression and action are logically, and at times also practically, separate."
  

Top answer

Hi, This is academic text in British English. I have marked the phrases/words that I am unsure of in capital letters. In addition, I am not sure of punctuation (commas).

  • Hi, This is academic text in British English.
  • I have marked the phrases/words that I am unsure of in capital letters.
  • In addition, I am not sure of punctuation (commas).
  • Here are a few edits and comments.
  • "The introduction of the formulation and the relevant elements of this theory as presented by the leading figures of the ‘Realist School’ no comma is followed by sub-chapters that discuss the various types of criticism RAISED ove r the approach in general, or certain aspects or even details of it.
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3 Answers
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Hi,

This is academic text in British English.

I have marked the phrases/words that I am unsure of in capital letters. In addition, I am not sure of punctuation (commas).

Here are a few edits and comments.

"The introduction of the formulation and the relevant elements of this theory as presented by the leading figures of the ‘R
0
Many thanks!

Just one follow-up question: the last sentence. Would it be possible to state that

"I posit that the perception of threats, repression and action are logically, and at times also practically, separate."

i.e 'perception' in singular, omitting the word 'of' from the two following nouns?
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Hi,

Just one follow-up question: the last sentence. Would it be possible to state that

"I posit that the perception of threats, repression and action are logically, and at times also practically, separate."

i.e 'perception' in singular, omitting the word 'of' from

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