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Jcecil55 Posted 10 years ago
On early divorce
-On early divorce
In solitude, I search for will,
to mend my soul, and shed the chill
of broken love; the loss and fears
I taste this day of salt and tears.
Memories - are but the foe
that drags my fractured spirit slow
my children’s voices cast no balm
I search for hope in prayer and psalm.
The glinting light of each new day
is framed in healing, yet I pay
for I must find a soldiers spark
to draw in light and slay the dark
My friend is time; its patient will
this passing days make dull the nil
which left me empty - duped of trust
the sunlit sky precedes the dusk.
The dusk is tired; a weary yawn
the slumber calms until the dawn
I rise oppressed by pains full scope
A new day born: I ache for hope.
In solitude, I search for will,
to mend my soul, and shed the chill
of broken love; the loss and fears
I taste this day of salt and tears.
Memories - are but the foe
that drags my fractured spirit slow
my children’s voices cast no balm
I search for hope in prayer and psalm.
The glinting light of each new day
is framed in healing, yet I pay
for I must find a soldiers spark
to draw in light and slay the dark
My friend is time; its patient will
this passing days make dull the nil
which left me empty - duped of trust
the sunlit sky precedes the dusk.
The dusk is tired; a weary yawn
the slumber calms until the dawn
I rise oppressed by pains full scope
A new day born: I ache for hope.
Top answer
You have a few errors I will point out to you. -On early divorce (Capitalize the words in the title. ) In solitude, I search for will, to mend my soul, and shed the chill of broken love; the loss and fears I taste this day of salt and tears.
- You have a few errors I will point out to you.
- -On early divorce (Capitalize the words in the title.
- ) In solitude, I search for will, to mend my soul, and shed the chill of broken love; the loss and fears I taste this day of salt and tears.
- Memories - are but the foe that drags my fractured spirit slow my children’s voices cast no balm I search for hope in prayer and psalm.
- ) which left me empty - duped of trust the sunlit sky precedes the dusk.
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2 Answers
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You have a few errors I will point out to you.
-On early divorce (Capitalize the words in the title. Do you mean "recent" divorce?) (Each line of the poem should begin with a capital letter.)
In solitude, I search for will,
to mend my soul, and shed the chill
of broken love; the loss and fears
I taste this day of salt and tears.
Memories -
-On early divorce (Capitalize the words in the title. Do you mean "recent" divorce?) (Each line of the poem should begin with a capital letter.)
In solitude, I search for will,
to mend my soul, and shed the chill
of broken love; the loss and fears
I taste this day of salt and tears.
Memories -
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Thank your for taking the time to read my poem. I appreciate the critique. Your suggestions are constructive.
James Cecil
James Cecil
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