Ode - I can't believe I did it.

Ode
by Attila József, translation by Peter Szabo


I’m sitting on a twinkling wall of rocks.
Summer’s lying-
Its breeze, as the warmth of
a nice dinner, is flying.
I get my heart accustomed to silence.
I have a chance-
what’s disappeared gathers here,
the head bows and the hand near
just hangs.

I’m watching the mane of the hills-
your forehead’s light,
flashed by the leaves in the night
no- one’s on the road,
your skirt flies away, along
the flutters of the night.
Under the leafy boughs
I can see as your hair strokes
the air, your soft breasts- and as
the stream’s running along-
I see, as, on the stones, is born:
your angel smile, as a breath.

Oh, how much I love you,
who drew me out, with a glance,
both, in my heart’s rooms hidden
intrigue of loneliness,
and the Universe.

As waterfall of its own roar, you, dear
part from me, in silence run farther,
while me, among tops of my life, near
the approaching distance, I sing, cry,
wriggling on the ground and in the sky:
I love you so, dear stepmother.

I love you as a child loves his mum,
as its depth the silent mine,
as rooms like the light, the fine
flame likes the soul, body likes calmness!
I love you as those mortal like
to live until the moment they die.

Your every smile, breath, move, word
I keep, as fallen things keeps the ground.
Just as acid into steel swords,
you bit my mind where my instincts you found-
kind, nicely shaped bird,
your existence fills everything around.

Moments clattering walk by,
but you stay mutely in my brain.
Stars catch fire and fall, die,
you’ re still in my eyes as in river the rain.
Your taste, as silence in a lair
in my mouth is floating as cool air,
and on the glass, your hand stays,
I see the fine veins.
It’s looming there somewhere.


Oh, what kind of material am I,
that your eyes cut and shape me?
What soul, oh, and what light,
makes me walk all over, in this twilight,
the gently slooping sights of your body?
And as the Word is received by open mind,
it secrets are received by my two eyes…



Your arteries, as a rose- bush
tremble continuously as
they carry current for your
cheeks so love can bloom and
your womb can have a blessed fruit in the end.
Your stomach’s sensitive sole
is embroidered by a whole
bunch of fine roots, spun all
into piles as food they devour,
and your blood cells roar
their glory for us all.


Eternal matter flows as a tide
as your bowels’ tunnels they reach,
and excrement gains hot, rich life
in the busy fountains of your kidneys.

Wavy hills arise there,
zodiacs tremble in you, somewhere,
lakes move, factories work,
millions of animals bustle, birds,
beetles,
weed,
cruelty and good deed;
Sun is shining, northern light is lour-
in your essence in silence pours
the unconscious eternal deep.


As clotted blood, these words
vibrate,
fall in front of you.
Existence stutters,
only the law is clear.
But my busy organs which’ ve created me on
and on, they’ve prepared, as my thoughts,
to become mute.

But till then they all shout-
You, the one, above
two billion humans ,
the only, soft cradle around,
deep grave, living bed I’ve found,
accept me in!...

( How high’s the down sky!
Armies shine in its ore.
The strong light hurts my eye.
I believe I’m lost, I fall.
I hear as above me,
My heart beats once more.)


Enclosure

( Train’s carrying me, I follow you, love,
once I’ll maybe find you there, above,
maybe this burning face cools once,
maybe, silently, you’ll speak as I glance:
Fresh water’s splashing, have a bath!
Here’s the towel, dry yourself up in the grass!
Meat is frying, I know you’ve waited that!
Where I’m lying , that is your bed.)