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Noemanza Posted 16 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Noemanza

Hello!!

Can you help me? It´s rigth this paragraph?

I searched a job for paying my university studys and I began to work in Macdonals for eigth months. In that time, I went to ork in the afternoon and three o four days at the week I had dinner fast food on the job. Four months ago, I had a blood test and the result was that my cholesterol increased enough, when I never had had it in my life.

Thank
  

Top answer

I have underlined some problem areas: I searched a job for paying my university studys and I began to work in Macdonals for eigth months. In that time, I went to ork in the afternoon and three o four days at the week I had dinner fast food on the job. Four months ago, I had a blood test and the result was that my cholesterol increased enough, when I never had had i t in my life.

— Mister Micawber

  • I have underlined some problem areas: I searched a job for paying my university studys and I began to work in Macdonals for eigth months.
  • In that time, I went to ork in the afternoon and three o four days at the week I had dinner fast food on the job.
  • Four months ago, I had a blood test and the result was that my cholesterol increased enough, when I never had had i t in my life.
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1 Answers
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I have underlined some problem areas:

I searched a job for paying my university studys and I began to work in Macdonals for eigth months. In that time, I went to ork in the afternoon and three o four days at the week I had dinner fast food on the job. Four months ago, I had a blood test and the
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