Neighbours by Alfian

Question

Neighbours by Alfian During Hari Raya she knocks on my conscience I knock on her door and I give her cakesShe say she likes them and gives me Sweets with gelatine inside. I throw them away.Poor woman, doesn't know how to make cakesHer children eat Maggi after school everyday.Thats why the elder one is in normal stream.And the younger one can't spell her name.If I was her age I wouldn't be wearing shorts at home. No shame, she doesn't know how to hide her womanhoodWhen the children are naughty and I beat themI close the door: I hear she's a gossipBut she beats her children harder than I doWhat to do her children are like thatI once hear her scream she wanted to kill herselfThese people never value their own lives Other times I see her I smile and she smiles back And her children smile and call me auntieBut in our hands we hold with fists clenched tightThe keys to our homes, each night we slam the bolt shutMy Annotations:Hari Raya –– Festive period, sharing joyShe knocks on my conscience –– Neighbour knocks on speaker conscience (sense of right/wrong)                                                        Conscience is usually compared to a doorI give her cakes –– Speaker is thoughtful and bothers to give cake Sweets with gelatine inside –– Gelatine is non-halal. Muslim cannot eat gelatine(pork). Speaker is muslim.                                                   Neighbour is insensitiveeat Maggi after school everyday –– Instant Noodles: Speaker thinks that the neighbour does not care about                                                            her children. Lazy to cook, give unhealthy food as the mother. elder one is in Normal Stream –– Cut off for express 188. People scoring below 188 is academically weakerYounger one cant spell her name –– 5-6 Years Old?^^ IRONY: The speaker is making a conclusion that eating maggi makes you stupid. That is illogical but she is              criticising other people's children for being weak in their thinking abilitieswearing shorts at home –– Speaker is conservative thinks that revealing legs it not appropriate for                                              women(because she is a muslim) -&gt; Muslim women will often cover their hair                                             legs arms to be modest. -&gt; Assumes that everyone should be as conservative                                                as her...I need help with the metaphor to explain in P.E.E.L format. These annotations are what I have came up with so far about the poem but I feel my metaphor explanation is still lacking. Please advice and help me!

Dave_anon · Accepted Answer

Hi

Your notes are really good - they helped me to understand parts of the poem that I didn't get the first time

To put it into an essay, I think you just need to pick out some points that are particularly to do with metaphor - the ones where a physical image is being used to show the inner thoughts of the writer

- Knocks on my conscience, I think you must mention that;

- the food metaphors, 'gelatine' and 'Maggi': they show how the writer does not approve of the neighbour

Then, for each one, you need to put together a paragraph that says why you think that the metaphor works and how it links into the main theme of the poem

I'm not a PEEL teacher - you may need more advice on how you connect your point, evidence, explanation and the link

- Alfian Sa'at opens the poem with a startling metaphor. Maybe we are expecting the neighbour to knock upon the door, but she knocks upon the conscience. This sets the tone for the poem. It seems that the writer has a nagging doubt that he and his neighbour should make contact but, as we see in the lines that follow, his doubts are not resolved

Well, that's my first thoughts - hope that is of some help

Dave

King of Cars · Answer

anonymousBut in our hands we hold with fists clenched tightThe keys to our homes, each night we slam the bolt shut

They don't trust each other

Sourmilked cakes · Answer

During Hari Raya she knocks on my conscience

I knock on her door and I give her cakes

She say she likes them and gives me

Sweets with gelatine inside. I throw them away.

Poor woman, doesn't know how to make cakes

Her children eat Maggi after school everyday.

Thats why the elder one is in normal stream.

And the younger one can't spell her name.

If I was her age I wouldn't be wearing shorts at home.

No shame, she doesn't know how to hide her womanhood

When the children are naughty and I beat them

I close the door: I hear she's a gossip

But she beats her children harder than I do

What to do her children are like that

I once hear her scream she wanted to kill herself

These people never value their own lives

Other times I see her I smile and she smiles back

And her children smile and call me auntie

But in our hands we hold with fists clenched tight

The keys to our homes, each night we slam the bolt shut

Annotation

“she knocks on my conscience”

-Knocking on her sense of right and wrong, showing that the speaker is unsure on how to act.

-The speaker is saying it as if the neighbour is messing with her head on weather or no she should open the door

“Sweets with gelatine… ,.. I throw them away.”

-Gelatine contains pork, muslims cannot consume pork as it is haram. The neighbour isn't aware of that.

-Throwing it away shows that the speaker did not consume it.

“eat Maggi after school everyday.

That's why the elder one is in normal stream.”

-Emphasising on how the woman does not know how to cook at all, feeding her children maggi everyday

-normal stream is for people scoring below 188, which is academically weaker, showing that her elder one is not that intelligent

“ younger one can't spell her name.”

-Actually thats just sad but jokes aside, it shows how much the kid does not pay attention to her to even know that.

-Its either that or her name’s hard to spell.

“wearing shorts at home.

No shame, she doesn't know how to hide her womanhood”

-No modesty, senses how she cant even bother about her appearance.

Muslims also tend to cover their hair, arms and legs and not show a lot of skin to show modesty so the speaker is shocked the neighbour is not as conservative as her.

“ I hear she's a gossip”

-reason for the speaker to close the door

-She does not want others to know, and gossiping about others businesses is just downright bad.

“But she beats her children harder than I do

What to do her children are like that”

-Say she does not really have the right to say nasty things about people especially if she does so much worse.

“What to do her children are like that”

-The speaker is emphasising she is also not entirely to blame as her children may be alot worse and tiring/hard to handle.

“I once hear her scream she wanted to kill herself”\

-She really does not enjoy living like this yet there’s nothing to do, so she threatens her own life.

“ I smile and she smiles back”

-But yet, she's not all bad.

“But in our hands we hold with fists clenched tight

The keys to our homes, each night we slam the bolt shut”

-Despite the ups and downs between the speaker and the neighbour, they still dont trust each other enough to not lock the doors.

Anonymous · Answer

Hi, I am new to this website and I read your poem. It has helped me a lot for my literature exam. Thank you!

Neighbours by Alfian

Neighbours by Alfian

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