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Mon Myat Posted 19 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

my trip

0 Though again..., what had i done in whole year? After Christmas, we went to the gospel trip to small villages one is" Myint Kyo" ; another one is “Kyawe da Nyin Gone" (buffalo....village)The journey so hard, especially over a long distance ; a long car journey, the first thing we rode train, pony-cart, car canoe ... and then we arrived “Myit kyo”village.02br
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00When we arrived at the village I felt that ................ and then, at that night our performance has been good recently such as drama, mime, puppet show, solo, Duet, Group song and Burmese dance with play a joke...We finished at until 1:30am........ 02br
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00Next day , we couldn't get up early morning but we'd try and celebrated a Christmas party at Myit Kyo church ...after that we were packed off to moved another place so we rode canoe, car , motorcycle walking long journey . Motorcycle couldn’t through the bridge so we must have walked 4 miles. 02br
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00When we arrived at “kyawe Dan yin gone” village, we’ve had problems with the water supply (lately) everybody looks like jungle man... You know, we’ve been breathe dust…. No more water, no light?????? So what should we done? We took dinner first & prepared for night program and then we started at nearly 9:30pm it’s getting cold. Time’s too late but we’ve got another problem. Generator doesn’t work so we prayed a lot bless it. Everybody wait see…… nobody went back home. 02br
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00Our performances was as same as "Myit Kyo" program & we finished at 2:00 am. After that we went back hostel everybody wants to take a rest but not enough for mat. We’ve got one mat. How could we sleep? (20 girls)We’d big…..big trouble 0-
  

Top answer

0Hello, I've made some corrections in bold and the highlighted areas are other problems that I've left you to work out for yourself. Your main problems are with prepositions and articles. You are missing out lots of these.

  • 0Hello, I've made some corrections in bold and the highlighted areas are other problems that I've left you to work out for yourself.
  • Your main problems are with prepositions and articles.
  • You are missing out lots of these.
  • You also have a lot of problems with punctuation and are just putting lots in at random.
  • Don't leave a space before any punctuation, such as commas.
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2 Answers
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0Hello, I've made some corrections in bold and the highlighted areas are other problems that I've left you to work out for yourself. Your main problems are with prepositions and articles. You are missing out lots of these. You also have a lot of problems with punctuation and are just putting lots in at random. Don't leave a space before any punctuation, such as commas. Stop using random rows of
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0Dear nona!!02br
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00Thanks for your kindness!!!02br
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00*** bless you!02br
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00mon myat0-

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