My Lovely Precious Ping!

You have left me alone with memories.

Still I love you.
I cannot forget the nongiven kisses.
The never seen smiles.
The never touched smoothness of your skin.


I cannot forget the urgency of your words:

"Hurry my love!
Come quickly to see me.
I will be yours forever and you will be mine."


But now you are gone.
Struck lifeless by car at the Nanning airport where you waited anxiously for me.
Not caring to look both ways because you believed I had failed you again.

In Beijing I was detained.
But you knew it not.
Led astray to gates where no plane ever came.
Tickets promised that were never issued.

You waited in vain and then died.
Cursed me with your dying breath.
Cursed the love that you never should have granted me.


"Ping is dead.'
It is that simple. "
Your friend said:

"And she cursed you before she died!
Always remember that!"

Now silent is the world again without you.
My eyes are scorched from weeping.
My heart beats with reluctance.
I awaken each day to a sunless world.


I am a shapeless shadow.
A mindless ephemeral seeking the evanescence of death.

Who am I to have survived you my love?
For what cause am I permitted to live my queen?

You were all I had and will ever have.
You will be my true love forever.
My beautiful, lovely, precious Ping.