My aunt (who) I lived with.

Question

Hi.I had a discussion auite some time ago with people claiming that they found the sentence "My aunt I live with" to be grammatically correct.I can find no rule saying that "who" must not be left out here, as it could be in "The aunt I live with".What are other oppinions?To me "my aunt I live with" doesn't work...

Nicole Rasool · Accepted Answer

Well, you really need to complete your sentence to really tell what's going on here grammatically. In any case, let me discuss a couple of things.

It would be okay to say 'My aunt I live with...' if you say it like this:

My aunt, I live with, is calling me for dinner.

Here, 'I live with' becomes a non essential element separated by commas, and this makes the sentence correct. However, this is not correct:

My aunt I live with is calling me for dinner.

You have to have the commas to separate the non essential element. OR

You could also say this:

My aunt who I live with is calling me for dinner.

Hope this helps.

AlpheccaStars · Answer

NoctivagusHi.

I had a discussion auite some time ago with people claiming that they found the sentence "My aunt I live with" to be grammatically correct.

I can find no rule saying that "who" must not be left out here, as it could be in "The aunt I live with".

What are other oppinions?

To me "my aunt I live with" doesn't work...

My aunt I live with

The aunt I live with

First, these are both fragments, not complete sentences. An analysis requires a proper sentence to start with.

These are natural and fine:

The aunt I live with prefers tea.

The aunt that I live with prefers tea.

This next one just sounds strange. And the reason has to do with the rules of restrictive versus nonrestrictive clauses and possessive pronouns as determiners.

X My aunt I live with prefers tea.

A nonrestrictive clause demands to be set off with commas. The determiner "my" has already identified (restricted) the aunt, so the following clause is nonrestrictive. The nonrestrictive clause also requires a relative pronoun.

My aunt, who I live with, prefers tea.

The same is true with the first sentence - the clause is restrictive, so it should not be set off with commas:

X The aunt, who I live with, prefers tea.

Noctivagus · Answer

Thank you for your answers.

I didn't give you a complete sentence as there wasn't one that I could remember. so "prefers tea" is as good as any.

I'm a little confused now as these answers seem to contradict each other. For me "My aunt I live with prefers tea" seems wrong in any case, with or without commas, as AlpheccaStars suggests.

CalifJim · Answer

AlpheccaStarsFor me "My aunt I live with prefers tea" seems wrong in any case, with or without commas, as AlpheccaStars suggests.

Yes. It's wrong with or without commas.

CJ

BarbaraPA · Answer

Nicole RasoolIt would be okay to say

My aunt, I live with, is calling me for dinner.

Here, 'I live with' becomes a non essential element separated by commas, and this makes the sentence correct.

No, it does not!

My aunt, who[m] I live with, is... is okay, but without the who[m], it's wrong.

Anonymous · Answer

NoctivagusHi.

I had a discussion auite some time ago with people claiming that they found the sentence "My aunt I live with" to be grammatically correct.

I can find no rule saying that "who" must not be left out here, as it could be in "The aunt I live with".

What are other oppinions?

To me "my aunt I live with" doesn't work...

Then, just say my aunt with whom I live...

Regards

Clive · Answer

Hi,

My aunt (that) I live with prefers tea.

This sounds fine to me. I take it to mean that you have another aunt. You don't live with this second aunt. And she doesn't prefer tea. You may even have several such aunts.

Clive

Noctivagus · Answer

Thanks, but this is becoming really confusing.

Certainly I will stick to saying "My aunt who i live with...", but again some people claim that "My aunt I live with prefers tea" is fine, while others say it's worng.

CalifJim · Answer

NoctivagusThanks, but this is becoming really confusing.
... but again some people claim that "My aunt I live with prefers tea" is fine, while others say it's worng.

This shouldn't be surprising. It's just the way forums work! Not everyone agrees on the grammaticality of every construction.

To my ear the sentence is anomalous, and I have no better explanation than the one given by Alphecca. Apparently in my variety of English (and in Alphecca's) it is ungrammatical to combine a personal pronoun-adjective determiner (my) as a premodifier of a noun with a restrictive relative clause postmodifying the same noun ((who) I live with).

Hence, I reject all the following:

your book that I put on the table

our problem that we talked about yesterday

their child who won the prize

It seems I always get across the essential meaning of such phrases in a different way:

that book of yours that I put on the table

that problem of ours that we talked about yesterday

that child of theirs who won the prize

CJ

My aunt (who) I lived with.

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