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Anonymous Posted 17 years ago
Letter Writing
Motivation letter for university- please help!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hi, I have to write a motivation letter for university and feel stuck. The admission to the this program is exceptionally important to me so I need a really good letter. Please help!!!This is just a draft, I would just like to know if you think this version is really bad and I should write a new letter or if this is something I can work with. Also, how does it feel to native speakers of English? Any funny sentences/expressions I could get rid of???Thanks so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am writing to express my interest
in the master's program X at the X University in X.
I am currently enrolled in a
Bachelor's program at X, my major is German Philology and my minor is Jouralism.
I have completed over 2/3 of my studies and expect to receive my degree in
February 2010.
I have chosen to take a literature
specialisation as this would prepare me for the Master's program X better and I will write my Bachelor thesis in literature.
Learning
languages has always been my passion and I studied German Philology at the
X University before coming to X to study
at the X. I moved to X by myself and have had to support myself
from the beginning of my studies. It has been tough at
times, but despite the
difficulties I have encountered I feel
that due to my hard work and motivation, I have managed to succeed.
The X program
feels like a natural choice to me. During my studies, I have developed an even
stronger interest for literature, culture and politics. Whenever
possible, I have written papers that involved the English language or culture,
such as about the influence of English on Dutch, the Latino culture in America etc.
I am interested in many aspects of
North America. I feel that as a U.S. citizen I have a deeper understanding of
the culture, but at the same time, since I have been living outside of the U.S.
for so long, I am able to maintain an objective view/standpoint, I feel
grateful that I have been able to experience life in America X and X and believe that this will be a strong asset in my future career.
In the summer of 2008 I did an intership with X a non-profit
organisation based in X that promotes and advocates equity in the
society. I
worked on the X campaign which was a very inspiring and
insightful experience. My duties included informing and
encouraging the Latinos to participate in the presidential elections and minor translation services. I believe
that this experience has been succesful as I not only learned a great deal about the American
political system and the Latin culture but also proved myself to be supportive
and helpful to this huge campaign.
Recently I have had the opportunity to speak to X, who
has completed the Magister program and who has provided me with
a helpful insight and has reconfirmed that this will be the right choice for me,
career- and academic-wise.
I would like to stress once again how exceptionally important
admission to this program for me is and how passionate I am about it. Due to the interdisciplinary character of this program, it would help me to develop my academic and personal interests in a way that no other would.
Thank you for your consideration, X
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am writing to express my interest
in the master's program X at the X University in X.
I am currently enrolled in a
Bachelor's program at X, my major is German Philology and my minor is Jouralism.
I have completed over 2/3 of my studies and expect to receive my degree in
February 2010.
I have chosen to take a literature
specialisation as this would prepare me for the Master's program X better and I will write my Bachelor thesis in literature.
Learning
languages has always been my passion and I studied German Philology at the
X University before coming to X to study
at the X. I moved to X by myself and have had to support myself
from the beginning of my studies. It has been tough at
times, but despite the
difficulties I have encountered I feel
that due to my hard work and motivation, I have managed to succeed.
The X program
feels like a natural choice to me. During my studies, I have developed an even
stronger interest for literature, culture and politics. Whenever
possible, I have written papers that involved the English language or culture,
such as about the influence of English on Dutch, the Latino culture in America etc.
I am interested in many aspects of
North America. I feel that as a U.S. citizen I have a deeper understanding of
the culture, but at the same time, since I have been living outside of the U.S.
for so long, I am able to maintain an objective view/standpoint, I feel
grateful that I have been able to experience life in America X and X and believe that this will be a strong asset in my future career.
In the summer of 2008 I did an intership with X a non-profit
organisation based in X that promotes and advocates equity in the
society. I
worked on the X campaign which was a very inspiring and
insightful experience. My duties included informing and
encouraging the Latinos to participate in the presidential elections and minor translation services. I believe
that this experience has been succesful as I not only learned a great deal about the American
political system and the Latin culture but also proved myself to be supportive
and helpful to this huge campaign.
Recently I have had the opportunity to speak to X, who
has completed the Magister program and who has provided me with
a helpful insight and has reconfirmed that this will be the right choice for me,
career- and academic-wise.
I would like to stress once again how exceptionally important
admission to this program for me is and how passionate I am about it. Due to the interdisciplinary character of this program, it would help me to develop my academic and personal interests in a way that no other would.
Thank you for your consideration, X
Top answer
Hi, My first reaction is that you definitely need to break this into paragraphs. You need an introductory paragraph a separate paragraph for each reason you want to attend this university a concluding paragraph This will allow the reader to easily see the way you have organized your thoughts. Many native speakers will just look at one huge paragraph, such as you have written, and conclude that this person is not an organized thinker.
- Hi, My first reaction is that you definitely need to break this into paragraphs.
- You need an introductory paragraph a separate paragraph for each reason you want to attend this university a concluding paragraph This will allow the reader to easily see the way you have organized your thoughts.
- Many native speakers will just look at one huge paragraph, such as you have written, and conclude that this person is not an organized thinker.
- They might even just give up and not read it.
- So, I suggest you revise your first attempt, and then repost it so that we can try to help you further.
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1 Answers
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Hi,
My first reaction is that you definitely need to break this into paragraphs.
You need
an introductory paragraph
a separate paragraph for each reason you want to attend this university
a concluding paragraph
This will allow the reader to easily see the way you have organized your thoughts. Many native speakers will jus
My first reaction is that you definitely need to break this into paragraphs.
You need
an introductory paragraph
a separate paragraph for each reason you want to attend this university
a concluding paragraph
This will allow the reader to easily see the way you have organized your thoughts. Many native speakers will jus
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