Motivation letter?

This is a rough copy of my motivation letter to a Finland University. I have read through it many times but I am not yet content. I would appreciate all comments and help! Thanks

Dear Sir/Madam,

My name is Chi. I am hereby applying for entrance to the bachelor English program in Hospitality Management. My interest in hospitality management grew when I had a volunteer work in Melia hotel, which has changed my mind definitely about hospitality industry.

Subsequently, I studied hotel management in National Economics University and had more specialized knowledge about hospitality sector. After getting into university, the first thing I want is expanding my knowledge and gaining more experiences in the service industry. So I took on a part-time job, waiting table in a coffee and fast food restaurant. Besides, I have five year experience in sale and management my online clothing store on Facebook and Instagram.

Such a career requires a person who is very outgoing, has great interpersonal skills, someone practical and someone determined. I feel that I have all these qualities. As a waitress, I focus on cooperating with my co-workers to keep the customers happy. I have a good ability to be smiling at any moment, making people feel as comfortable around me as possible. Also, I am a determined girl who will never give up getting something done no matter how much stress I am under. In my first year of university, I had to handle three work in the same time: doing a part time job, managing my online clothing store as well as still ensure to get good grades in university. While studying in university, I known about Finland and Saimaa UAS, where offered hospitality management course with high quality education and providing international environment. Also, a degree course in University of Applied Science is very practice and application-relevant so that the knowledge can be used straightaway, which cannot find in any university’s course in my country, plus living and integrating with multilingual people in order to develop my language which is undoubtedly one of my reasons to study in an European country. In order to pursue my dream, I decided to reserve my studying at university in Vietnam and leave the past time job to focus on applying for Finland’s universities – the next important challenge in my life, where I think is an ideal destination for me to not only broaden my horizons but accelerate my personal and academic growth as well. I tried my best preparing for this entrance exam because I believe hard work pays off in the end.

Apart from my aspiration for my career, being admitted to Saimaa UAS is not only an opportunity to pursue my dream career but also an opportunity for me to devote my interpersonal skill to promote companionship in Saimaa’s international community.
Thank you for considering my application, and I look forward to your acceptance.

Sincerely yours,