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Cute butterfly Posted 13 years ago
Grammar

motivation letter

Please who can help me to find mistakes in my motivation letter ,THANK YOU

Dear Hiring Manager for UNV,

I would like to express my interest in The United Nations Volunteer position. I am very impressed by the significant responsibilities UNV offers and its ample opportunities to excel as someone who supports peace and development worldwide. More importantly to me, UNV's philosophy is particularly well suited to my background.

As you will note in my resume, I have knowledge in the field of communication because of my professional experience in working as an English teacher and as a customer service representative position add to that my degree in Master for English for Telecommunication.

Furthermore, working as a customer service representative with a US company has taught me how to deal with a wide variety of customers, from the pleasant customer to the irritated. In every case, I assess their needs and I am good at understanding the psyche of the customers and hence knowing when to identify opportunities to sell services to the customer. The vast majority of my customers have walked away feeling satisfied. More importantly, they have returned to do business with us again.

Through my experiences and academic background, I have acquired determination, independence, initiative, and the ability to learn quickly and apply that learning proactively. Equipped with interpersonal skills enhanced by education at excellent schools, and bolstered by unique experiences, I am confident that I can contribute significantly to UNV.
I would love to start my career in UNV, and I am confident that I would be a beneficial addition to this programme.

You can find my qualifications and skills in the enclosed resume. If you would like to have more information about my qualifications and skills, please contact me by e-mail or phone.
I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely,
  

Top answer

Here are some suggestions: I would like to express my interest in The United Nations Volunteer (spell the acronym here in parentheses because you use it later on) position. I am very impressed by the significant responsibilities UNV offers (the position offers these responsibilities, or the organization? ) who supports peace and development worldwide.

  • Here are some suggestions: I would like to express my interest in The United Nations Volunteer (spell the acronym here in parentheses because you use it later on) position.
  • I am very impressed by the significant responsibilities UNV offers (the position offers these responsibilities, or the organization?
  • ) who supports peace and development worldwide.
  • ) my background.
  • As you will note in my resume, I have knowledge in the field of communication s because of my professional experience in working as an English teacher and as a customer service representative position (run-on sentence.
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2 Answers
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Here are some suggestions:

I would like to express my interest in The United Nations Volunteer (spell the acronym here in parentheses because you use it later on) position. I am very impressed by the significant responsibilities UNV offers (the position offers these responsibilities, or the organization? Be clear)
and its (antecedent?) ample opportunities to excel as so

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