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Chowbarry Posted 10 years ago
Letter Writing
Modification work
Please help me improve the following draft e-mail. Thank you very much.
Dear Mr. Evans,
This office, especially our tree management team, have been committed to conduct routine inspection on a large number of trees located at the enclosed areas presently surrounded either by railings or dwarf walls in the King's Region (please see the attached document for more details).
With the presence of such dwarf walls and particularly the railings under your section's management affecting our thorough inspection on the trees and the implementation of other horticultural maintenance works to a certain extent, we would like to ask for your consideration to modify the railings such as by installing a movable gate or anything arrangement you may deem appropriate, depending on the surrounding environment.
In view of trees preservation having increasingly grown as a major issue within society, we are hopeful of having your professional view on our above proposal by the end of this month. Should you need further information about the matter or a joint site meeting for a detailed discussion such as the suggested location of the movable gate, please feel free to contact me.
Your sincerely,
GP
Dear Mr. Evans,
This office, especially our tree management team, have been committed to conduct routine inspection on a large number of trees located at the enclosed areas presently surrounded either by railings or dwarf walls in the King's Region (please see the attached document for more details).
With the presence of such dwarf walls and particularly the railings under your section's management affecting our thorough inspection on the trees and the implementation of other horticultural maintenance works to a certain extent, we would like to ask for your consideration to modify the railings such as by installing a movable gate or anything arrangement you may deem appropriate, depending on the surrounding environment.
In view of trees preservation having increasingly grown as a major issue within society, we are hopeful of having your professional view on our above proposal by the end of this month. Should you need further information about the matter or a joint site meeting for a detailed discussion such as the suggested location of the movable gate, please feel free to contact me.
Your sincerely,
GP
Top answer
Too many concessionary terms and unnecessary verbiage; it makes tiresome reading. Dear Mr. Evans, This office and our tree management team are responsible for regular inspections of trees i n areas surrounded by railings or short walls in the King's [Road?
- Too many concessionary terms and unnecessary verbiage; it makes tiresome reading.
- Dear Mr.
- Evans, This office and our tree management team are responsible for regular inspections of trees i n areas surrounded by railings or short walls in the King's [Road?
- College?
- ] region.
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2 Answers
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Too many concessionary terms and unnecessary verbiage; it makes tiresome reading.
Dear Mr. Evans,
This office and our tree management team are responsible for regular inspections of trees in areas surrounded by railings or short walls in the King's [Road? College? Park?] region. Please see the attached document for de
Dear Mr. Evans,
This office and our tree management team are responsible for regular inspections of trees in areas surrounded by railings or short walls in the King's [Road? College? Park?] region. Please see the attached document for de
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