Mark my IELTS and give me feedback please

Topic: Advertising is all around us; it is an unavoidable part of everyone’s life. Some people say that advertising is a positive part of our lives while others say it is a negative one. Discuss both views and include your own opinion.

By all accounts, advertising is an inevitable element of our lives. Numerous citizens presume that it delivers substantial merit. The others, however, consider it brings a lot of drawbacks. Notwithstanding that compelling arguments could be advanced to advocate for both views, I’m personally inclined on the former one.

There are two apparent evidences to support the former view in the first place. Advertising, without a doubt, plays a pivotal role in the success of practically any modern businesses. In other words, without advertisements, companies and manufactures wouldn’t stand a chance not only to launch theirs products, but also publicize them to the society, which might result in potential bankruptcy. A vast array of new start-up companies, is a case in point, has undergone an financial collapse on account of inefficient marketing strategies. Advertising additionally provides humans a variety of choices in making a purchase. They would be behind the time, as well as not be able to update the latest products in the absence of brand awareness.

Ironically, a lot of residents believe that advertising is a detrimental factor influencing our lives. It appears to aim the marketing levels at children in order to delude them to put a constant pressure on their parents to buy them things. Children, by other meanings, often be swayed by advertising since the lively animation is so tempting or alluring to them. A popular article has recently reveals that 90% of youngsters is often influenced by commercial. Advertising, equally important, seems to manipulate consumers’ psychology and behavior. It deludes people into making impulsive purchases, along with following the latest trend of technology, as a result of a belief that buying dispensable products will hearten them.

All things considered, I once again restate my belief that advertising is an crucial field of our lives, regardless of contradict perceptions between human race that advertising gives us either upsides or downsides.