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Vasuarm Posted 17 years ago
Grammar
Marital Home
Hi, Please correct the following sentences. Thank you.
Shrieking horns, came then a blue train and
Home it carried you, your marital home.
There under new skies
You’d become a wife, a mom and grandma.
Stupefied, I’d still watched the train
Leaving on the rails all my love for you.
The moving devil now looked black not blue,
Showing the color of my mourning mind.
Shrieking horns, came then a blue train and
Home it carried you, your marital home.
There under new skies
You’d become a wife, a mom and grandma.
Stupefied, I’d still watched the train
Leaving on the rails all my love for you.
The moving devil now looked black not blue,
Showing the color of my mourning mind.
Top answer
Hi, As poetry, this seems fine to me. Clive
- Hi, As poetry, this seems fine to me.
- Clive
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