0
Tanit Posted 19 years ago
Grammar

loss in trade

0Hi,02br
02br
00I'm not satisfied with the underlined expressions:02br
02br
01i00In terms of revenue, drops on match days depend on the type of store and on the period of the year, 01u00amounting up to02u00 fifty percent of the average revenue in a Saturday or Sunday without match. Of particular concern are events performed during 01u00those periods of the year associated with purchase of presents02u00. For instance, the sales manager of a store specialised in YYY reported that on Mother’s day revenues were lower than the previous week (while they were expecting an increase in sale) because of the ZZZ match occurring the previous day.02i02br
02br
00Are they innatural? Is there a better way to express these ideas? If you find any other mistakes, please let me know!02br
02br
00Thanks in advance!0-
  

Top answer

0 01blockquote 01cite 10Tanit12cite 10Hi,12br 12br 10I'm not satisfied with the underlined expressions:12br 12br 11i 10In terms of revenue, drops on match days depend on the type of store and [on the] 11font 10time12font 10 of 11del 10the12del 10 year, 11u 10amounting 11font 10to as much as12font 12u 10 fifty percent of the average revenue 11font 10for12font 10 a Saturday or Sunday without match. Of particular concern are events performed during 11u 10those 11font 10times of 12font 10year associated with 11font 10gift-giving12font 12u 10. 12i 12br 12br 10Are they innatural?

— Yankee

  • 0 01blockquote 01cite 10Tanit12cite 10Hi,12br 12br 10I'm not satisfied with the underlined expressions:12br 12br 11i 10In terms of revenue, drops on match days depend on the type of store and [on the] 11font 10time12font 10 of 11del 10the12del 10 year, 11u 10amounting 11font 10to as much as12font 12u 10 fifty percent of the average revenue 11font 10for12font 10 a Saturday or Sunday without match.
  • Of particular concern are events performed during 11u 10those 11font 10times of 12font 10year associated with 11font 10gift-giving12font 12u 10.
  • 12i 12br 12br 10Are they innatural?
  • Is there a better way to express these ideas?
  • 12br 12blockquote 10Hi Tanit02br 02br 00My suggestions are in the quote.
Free · every Monday

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬

New words, one handy idiom, and a 2-minute quiz — delivered to your inbox to keep your streak alive.

2 Answers
0
0 01blockquote
01cite10Tanit12cite10Hi,12br
12br
10I'm not satisfied with the underlined expressions:12br
12br
11i10In terms of revenue, drops on match days depend on the type of store and [on the] 11font10time12font10 of 11del10the12del1
0
0
0Hi, Yankee,02br
02br
00You've been really helpful, thanks! 050010id1
0

Related Questions