Looking for comments on a Motivation Letter for a dutch university

Dear friend

I have written a motivation letter (for a Dutch technical university.).

I just wonder if you could have a look and help me.

Thank you in advance.



Dear Sir, madam

I, [my full name], am a 23-year-old [nationality] who is interested in science and engineering and has a head for it. I am writing to apply for the BSc course Biochemical Engineering and, secondly, Sustainable Molecular Science and Technology at the Technical University of [cityname].

I got to know [university name short] through my family. My father and brother have been living in [country name] for several years. My brother, who is a successful student in cognitive neuroscience at [another university name in the same country], advised me to choose this university because it has got a disciplinary atmosphere and is experienced with foreign students. Once in an intelligence test in high school, I was placed first out of forty-five students. My field of interest basically includes technical majors. For me physics, chemistry and mathematics have always been easily understandable since first school grades and I usually was the top spot in those classes. Such lessons have been the centre of my attention and pleasant to learn. I understand implementing such sciences in industry, engineering, will have the same effect. Right now, I am working as an English teacher and really like the educational environment. The international environment of [university name short] would also affect as well my educational gain as my social and personal life as a student. I will be involved in communicating with people from various countries. That nationally and culturally different people could help each other find out new ways of learning and problem-solving, is another reason makes this university a good choice for me. Research orientation of study and multidisciplinary research groups in [university short name] will be particularly advantageous for me. It is quite probable for me to become a postgraduate student in [university short name]. I see my prospect as a vigorous, dedicated researcher who makes new discoveries and forms new ideas. On my opinion, in order to learn something one needs to experience it and get a chance to discover themselves.

Like watching the dung beetle breeding, scurrying, protecting itself and rolling a ball, I am used to examine and study natural phenomena. I like to live closer to nature, beside plants, animals, earth and jungles. I often look around to understand why nature behaves the way it does. Outside and inside the classroom, I use the word “why” enormously as well. Biologically active processes and structure of cells arouse my curiosity. At the age of twelve I was fascinated to genetics by the fiction "Jurassic Park", in which some scientists succeed in recreating dinosaurs by extracting their DNA from pieces of coal! In my daily life also, I notice behavioural heredity and likes between parents and children in families. As a result, my interest in biology and genetics caused me to go for biochemical engineering that also meets my want of chemical engineering. At high school, I was so good at chemistry and enjoyed it quite a lot. Studying how the cloud of electron positions in a molecule, I understood why different substances have different macro-characteristics and it was truly interesting! Whenever I needed additional information on chemistry for comprehension, not included in my high school book, I resourcefully asked a process engineer, my mother, who helped me at times a lot. Environmental problems, synthetic replacements, petroleum, polymers and food are the most interesting (bio)chemical topics for me. As a biochemical engineer, who is a universal engineer I think, I will specialise in a number of different fields and can have a variety of experiences in distinctive industries! My area of activity will probably be molecular bioelectronics (I am a computer buff and like electrical engineering too) and engineering biochips as live processing units. I am determined to become a scientist, whose name and findings outlive him and makes a difference in the scientific world. I believe this major will help me achieve that.

Besides I think, the more critical role a scientist plays in people’s lives, the more essential for them is to understand the morals of the human society. I am very much interested in the social aspect engineering and like to be in interaction with the society.

I hope the letter has been enlightening and convincing enough. Thanks for your consideration.

Yours faithfully

[my full name]