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Vincent Teo Posted 15 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
LIm's hobby
Please help me to correct them, thanks!!
(a) Lim is a talented boy. He is keen on playing guitar. He likes playing it during his free time. One Sunny morning, he went out shopping. He went past a music shop. There were / was a wide range of musical instruments. He saw a special designed guitar on a display through a transparent window. It was quite dear and attractive but he had no money.
(b) He defined / determined / made up his mind saving money since that days. He hoped to get his new guitar using his own money. His father gave him ten dollars (every day). He saved some from his pocket money and put it /them into a piggy bank. He started cultivating / to form / to establish his good habit that day onwards.
(c) After three months, he came back to the same shop. He bought a new guitar from the sale assistant / salesman. When he came back home, his parents felt proud and praised him to be indepedent. He was happy because his dream had finally come true.
(a) Lim is a talented boy. He is keen on playing guitar. He likes playing it during his free time. One Sunny morning, he went out shopping. He went past a music shop. There were / was a wide range of musical instruments. He saw a special designed guitar on a display through a transparent window. It was quite dear and attractive but he had no money.
(b) He defined / determined / made up his mind saving money since that days. He hoped to get his new guitar using his own money. His father gave him ten dollars (every day). He saved some from his pocket money and put it /them into a piggy bank. He started cultivating / to form / to establish his good habit that day onwards.
(c) After three months, he came back to the same shop. He bought a new guitar from the sale assistant / salesman. When he came back home, his parents felt proud and praised him to be indepedent. He was happy because his dream had finally come true.
Top answer
I have underlined some problems: (a) Lim is a talented boy. He is keen on playing guitar. He likes playing it during his free time.
- I have underlined some problems: (a) Lim is a talented boy.
- He is keen on playing guitar.
- He likes playing it during his free time.
- One Sunny morning, he went out shopping.
- He went past a music shop.
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3 Answers
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I have underlined some problems:
(a) Lim is a talented boy. He is keen on playing guitar. He likes playing it during his free time. One Sunny morning, he went out shopping. He went past a music shop. Therewere / was a wide range of musical instruments. He saw a special designed guitar on a display through a transparent window. It was quite dear
(a) Lim is a talented boy. He is keen on playing guitar. He likes playing it during his free time. One Sunny morning, he went out shopping. He went past a music shop. There
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I try:
(a) Lim is a talented boy. He is keen on playing guitar. He likes playing it during his free time. One Sunday morning, he went out shopping. He went past a music shop. Therewere / was a wide range of musical instruments. He saw a specially designed guitar on display through a transparent window. It was quite dear and attractive but he ha
(a) Lim is a talented boy. He is keen on playing guitar. He likes playing it during his free time. One Sunday morning, he went out shopping. He went past a music shop. There
00
When I strike through a word like this, Vincent, you should delete it.
(a) Lim is a talented boy. He is keen on playing guitar. He likes playing it during his free time. One Sunday morning, he went out shopping. He went past a music shop. Therewere / was a wide range of musical instruments. He saw a specially designed guitar on display through a transpa
(a) Lim is a talented boy. He is keen on playing guitar. He likes playing it during his free time. One Sunday morning, he went out shopping. He went past a music shop. There
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