LIFE---A STAGE OF PLAY

Question

Life is a stage of play,where every moment comes and then go away.Here we act the role of players,and whole the world, the spectators.The first part is our childhood,in which we get most of the motherhood.Here we play with lots of toys,and fill our life with so many joys.When we cry,the parents to laugh us make a try.When we smile,they get world's happiness for awhile.The second part is teenage,in which we feel out of the cage.Whether I am a child or an adult,makes this thiking all of us puzzled.Toys and dolls not remain our friends,for playing and fighting we change our trends.The next part is the young age,the wonderful, energetic, and the bright stage.Here we change our whole lifestyles,the fashions, the tastes, and all the files.Here we understand the meaning of life,and become one's husband or one's wife.The last part is the old age,here we are near to get away from the stage.The disesases and sorrows remain around us, make us feel we are only for fuss.Then comes the end of the play,we leave the stage and go into the clay.Please tell me how is my poem.

Mister Micawber · Accepted Answer

I have underlined some language problem areas:

Life is a stage of play,
where every moment comes and then go away.
Here we act the role of players,
and whole the world, the spectators.
The first part is our childhood,
in which we get most of the motherhood.
Here we play with lots of toys,
and fill our life with so many joys.
When we cry,
the parents to laugh us make a try.
When we smile,
they get world's happiness for awhile.

The second part is teenage,
in which we feel out of the cage.
Whether I am a child or an adult,
makes this thiking all of us puzzled.
Toys and dolls not remain our friends,
for playing and fighting we change our trends.

The next part is the young age,
the wonderful, energetic, and the bright stage.
Here we change our whole lifestyles,
the fashions, the tastes, and all the files.
Here we understand the meaning of life,
and become one's husband or one's wife.

The last part is the old age,
here we are near to get away from the stage.
The disesases and sorrows remain around us,
make us feel we are only for fuss.
Then comes the end of the play,
we leave the stage and go into the clay.

Please tell me how is my poem.-- It has some very interesting parts (and an idea already bettered by Shakespeare), but in your effort to create meter and rhyme you have strayed too far from acceptable English composition. You cannot twist the language that much unless you have the talent of ee cummings.

Shakespeare's version:

As You Like It, Act II, Scene VII [All the world's a stage]
by William Shakespeare

Jaques to Duke Senior All the world's a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances, And one man in his time plays many parts, His acts being seven ages. At first, the infant, Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms. Then the whining schoolboy, with his satchel And shining morning face, creeping like snail Unwillingly to school. And then the lover, Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad Made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then a soldier, Full of strange oaths and bearded like the pard, Jealous in honor, sudden and quick in quarrel, Seeking the bubble reputation Even in the cannon's mouth. And then the justice, In fair round belly with good capon lined, With eyes severe and beard of formal cut, Full of wise saws and modern instances; And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts Into the lean and slippered pantaloon, With spectacles on nose and pouch on side; His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide For his shrunk shank, and his big manly voice, Turning again toward childish treble, pipes And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all, That ends this strange eventful history, Is second childishness and mere oblivion, Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.

Vandana gupta · Answer

Thanks. Can you tell me from where I can learn the acceptable English composition?

LIFE---A STAGE OF PLAY

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