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BW2/3 Posted 20 years ago
Grammar

lie

How lonely he was after he lied to the police that he was not a driver for the blood accident and his wife, with guilty consciousness, left him after she supported his statement?

Is this sentence OK?

Thank you
  

Top answer

No. Please try again. Fix these: a driver for the blood accident consciousness

  • No.
  • Please try again.
  • Fix these: a driver for the blood accident consciousness
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7 Answers
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No. Please try again. Fix these:

a driver for the blood accident
consciousness

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How about this?

How lonely would he have felt after lying to police about him not being a driver for the ****** accident and seeing his wife leaving him after testifying on his behalf with a guilty conscience.

Any effort to modify mine would be welcomed.
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driver for the ****** accident?


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There's a lot of thoughts to tie up into one sentence, but here's one possibility:

How lonely he felt, after his wife-- who, because of her guilty conscience over testifying in support of the lie he told the police about his not being the driver in the ****** accident--left him.

Let's see how others might handle it. I assumed the restriction of doing
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Let me try again.

How lonely he was after he lied to the police that he was not a driver in the ****** accident and his wife, with guilty conscience, left him after she supported his statement?

Thank you all!
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That's better, BW.

But don't you want to connect his being lonely with the fact that his wife left him, not with the fact that he lied to the police?

As I said before, this is really too much information to pack into one sentence. Is it necessary to do so?
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hi davkett,

How lonely he was after he lied to the police that he was not a driver in the ****** accident and after his wife, with guilty conscience, left him after she had supported his statement?

His loneliness began after he lied to the police and after his wife left him.

I agree it is a lot of information to put into a sentence but it is fun to play with words, esp

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