letter of motivation

hello,i have written a letter of motivation and it has been proofreaad by a native speaker, i just want to know whether u think the content of this letter is ok or not? does it contain many personal info or is it ok?

Letter of Motivation

To Admissions Office,
G///n University,

I appreciate this opportunity to provide further background information in support of my application for entrance to the Master program of English Literature at Gr./// University scheduled to start in September 2013. I believe my academic background, combined with my work experience, is enough to fulfill your admission requirements.

I look forward to completing a degree in English Literature because I know it will help me progress, both professionally and personally. By studying literature I have found that a sense of self-discovery is a common theme in most literary works and this is what still amazes me about literature, to start a journey within your inner self.

While at high school I started reading Classic Literature. Having always been interested in foreign languages, when it was time to apply for undergraduate studies, it was clear that the Foreign languages Department would be my top choice. I chose English Translation as my main major to improve my [English] language proficiency, but I also attended all literature courses such as History of English Literature, Criticism, English Poetry and prose.

In 2004, my friends and I established a Non-Governmental Organization called Nasima in affiliation with National Youth Organization. I was elected as the leader of the Literary Group. During our weekly gathering for university students, we studied many well-known American and English novels and short stories, and analyzed each book’s individual lessons. This experience helped towards engraving my interest in team work and research-based studies.

In 2006 I graduated from university with a BA in English Translation with a GPA of 3.25/4. According to the Iranian grading system, my GPA is 16.27 (out of 20). After graduation, I pursued a job in teaching English and attended numerous Teacher Training Courses and workshops. I will also be attending the Oxford Teacher’s Academy in November 2012.

I firmly believe that learning English is a necessity for the people of my country. Iran has been ruled by dictators for many years and I believe that, through learning English, my people will be able to communicate with the rest of the world and can remain informed about international news. Learning an international language is what they need to awaken and to stand up for their rights in international organizations and communities. It can also enable them to be represented in international organizations and at events. It would be my honor to help in this regard through my chosen career path.

I want to study literature in my post graduate studies and to teach English literature in the future. I am very encouraged by the impressive changes that literary studies can bring about in people. Every book you read changes you - even if only slightly - and this is exactly what my people in Iran need.

I have chosen Gr// University because it is one of the oldest universities in the Netherlands and because it is a member of the Excellence Group of the best universities in Europe. I want to study in a place where everybody has freedom of speech and you are free to read all genres and discuss ideas in a multi-cultural environment. Unfortunately in Iran, we do not have access to some topics such as homosexual literature, feminist and political literature.
In conclusion, I would like to say that I am eager for a new challenge and, in my opinion; this program is the best way to achieve that. I I have no doubt that G// University would provide me with an excellent start on my journey into the intriguing world of Literature.

Sincerely yours