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Julietta Posted 21 years ago
Letter Writing

Letter of Motivation

Dear all,

first of all I would like to thank all members (and ´guests) for the possibility of this forum. I found it by chance and got many useful tips for the writing of a CV or letter of motivation.
Thank you.

As I am applying for an internship / practical training in the US, I have to write a letter of motivation.
I kindly ask you to check it and give me some useful advise how to improve it---I guess, it is not very good...
Waiting to hear from you - thank you and greeting from Germany,

Julia


Dear Sir / Madam, (the application will be given to several companies...)

With this letter I would like to explain my motivation for an employent at your company and apply for a practical training.

I graduated in Economis from the University of Applied Sciences, Konstanz, Germany in September 2004 where I obtained a degree in Management / Controlling.
After my graduation from High School in 1999, I was working as an intern for a jewellery company in my hometown, Pforzheim where I was allowed to find out more about the practical part of economics before studying economics. The internship gave me the opportunity to understand more about business. After this time, I was fascinated by economics and its daily challenges. My decision to study economics was confirmed.

Part of my studies at a University of Applied Sciences are two practical terms, where students work in a company of their own choice to gain practical experience. For 6 months I was working in Munich at the Hotel Bayerischer Hof, member of the “Leading hotels of the world” at the sales and F&B department. My duties included organizing events for groups, handling booking requests and the booking itself for important clients, groups as well as daily office duties. This work was very challenging because of the projects and sometimes extraordinary client requests.

In 2002 / 2003, I worked as an intern for the automotive company Porsche AG in Stuttgart in the marketing services department for another 6 months. This department organizes driving courses on european ormula one race tracks like Imola, Spa and Hockenheim Ring. The employment included the organisation of booking requests, bookings of the participants, hotel rooms and capacity as well as the organisation on the race track itself. Beeing a big fan of automobiles, especially sports cars, this internship was one of the most interesting employment. Furthermore I was able to learn ortganising and handling the most different people, events and challenges.

After graduation in autum 2004, I started another internship at a pharmaceutical company, Favodent Karl Huber GmbH, where I will be working until February 2005. My duties include the coordination of marketing events, market research and supportive work for the planned market entry in Brasil and Russia. Furthermore I supported the export management in their daily business, calculating prices, offering our products to foreign clients, checking delivery notes and invoices and the shipment itself. Due to the different freight forwarding and custom regulations, I learned to cooperate with diffent parties and matters.

The opportunity to work with several clients within Europe and the U.S., confirmed my decision to work abroad. As I am very interested in other countries, people and the way they are doing business, I am very curious to work in the U.S. and learn more about american economy and culture.
As I have spend many vacations with my grandparents, who are living in Florida, I am fascinated by the “american way of living” and would be pleased to be given the opportunity to experience living a longer period in the U.S.. Especially in todays time, it is very important to improve the own personal skills and work experience abroad.

Due to my work experience in different companies and employment with the most different personalities, I can offer my extended language skills, profound organisation skills as well as my ability to get easiliy used to new projects to my future employee. Furthermore, I am highly motivated to work in another country and in another language as I am ambitious to learn more every day. Aditionally, I learnde the values of teamwork and commitment as well as working hard and focus on given goals. My ability to structure my time and fit my activities into my schedule helped my to complete given projects succesfully.

The preferred field of employment would be in the marketing department or organisation of events. Besides that I would like to work closely together with clients. As I have learned and prooved working on my own before, my employment would does not need extended supersision.

Furthermore, I would like you to know that the accomondation will be organized by Interswop, Germany, as well as work permit , visa and custom matters.


Thank you very much for your time and considering my request, I am looking forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerly,


Julia
  

Top answer

Julia, I disagree. I think your letter is quite good. You have some minor grammatical stuff here and there.

  • Julia, I disagree.
  • I think your letter is quite good.
  • You have some minor grammatical stuff here and there.
  • But by and large, it is reasonably well written letter.
  • I don't have time to go through it right now, but take your letter and put into MS Word and perform a spell check.
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7 Answers
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Julia,

I disagree. I think your letter is quite good. You have some minor grammatical stuff here and there. But by and large, it is reasonably well written letter.

I don't have time to go through it right now, but take your letter and put into MS Word and perform a spell check. You will catch a lot of your spelling errors. Go through and looking for capitalization errors
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Dear Mountain Hiker,

Thank you very much for your help, I really do appreciate your work and tried to chnage my letter. As I have not found something helpful in the internet regard. "due to" I posted it in the grammar forum, we'll see if someone is able to help me-actually I am even more confused
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Julia,

My help is free. We moderators get no financial benefit.

Due to: [url="http://www.bartleby.com/64/C003/0107.html"][/url]

It does seem a bit pedantic, but there it is.

I have reviewed your stuff. I have made numerous edits throughout while trying to maintain "you
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Julia,

Also, please .

MountainHiker
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Dear Mountainhiker,

thank you so much for your help. Ive made all the changes you have written and I am now waiting for a positive reply. Hopefully I can start working in the US in April.

Thank you again and a happy new year to you!

Julia
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hi, i found out hat since u did the correction a bit in a hurry, there are still a few errors. i dont have time either, I would have gladly helped here. Please go over aagain if u can to correct the few mistakes.Thank you for helping her out. It's really nice of you.[Y]
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First of all, it is my pleasure to gain a chance to pursuit my academic education in your university at the PhD level in human science or to be more exactly in economics field. My name is KAMYAR and family name is RADNIA as well as I have two younger brothers without sister. So I was born and raised in Mahabad city at the West Azarbayjan state in Iran. I live in a house with my parent and I'm sing

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