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Shafi Rehma Posted 12 years ago
Grammar

Kindly correct my poem

These haunted voices
and gentle whispers
struck my ear once
Now echoes through my head.
Adrift were they
But have some traits shared
Like a blended color
Mixed into one
and leads me
to act and
Blossoms into love.
For I don’t know
Why they fused together?
Isn’t it my consciousness?
Awaken in dark,
Restless, tired
and busy in work
letting me sleep
to dream the worlds
I want to go
and never come back.
  

Top answer

These haunted voices and gentle whispers struck my ear once and echoed through my head. Adrift were they. They shared traits, like blended colors mixed into one that leads me to act and blossoms into love.

— Mister Micawber

  • These haunted voices and gentle whispers struck my ear once and echoed through my head.
  • Adrift were they.
  • They shared traits, like blended colors mixed into one that leads me to act and blossoms into love.
  • I d on’t know why they fused togeth er.
  • Is it my consciousness, awakening in dark, restless, tired and busy at work, letting me sleep to dream the worlds I want to see and never return?
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2 Answers
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These haunted voices
and gentle whispers
struck my ear once
and echoed through my head.
Adrift were they.
They shared traits,
like blended colors
mixed into one
that leads me
to act and
blossoms into love.
I don’t know
why
0

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