Just please correct my submission

Question

Life is full of things to do and to care about. As a young person, you may get bored of routine and repetitive habits. However, each one of us tries to find one or two interesting things to be indulged or engaged in. These enjoyable things to do can stop to be so if you meet a new lovely person in your life. This nice person becomes the alternative for all nice things. Life starts to look different with new taste, especially if that person can ultimately understand you and share your feeling. Because your life thoroughly changes by the emergence of that person in your life, it may be turned upside down and becomes a mere chaos when that dear person leave it intentionally, voluntarily or the opposite. Of course, it is worse to leave intentionally since this could embed or mean how little your value and importance are to that person. This departure may form one of the biggest shocks you receive in your life.

Mister Micawber · Accepted Answer

Hello, tranquility– and welcome to English Forums!

Life is full of things to do and to care about. As a young person, you may get bored of routine and repetitive habits, but each of us tries to find interesting activities to engage in. These can cease to be enjoyable, however, if you meet a new and attractive person who becomes an alternative to your other interests. Life starts to look and feel different, especially if that person comes to understand you and share your feelings. Your life can thoroughly change, but it may be turned upside down and become a chaos when that dear person leaves it intentionally or involuntarily. Of course, it is worse to be left intentionally, since that could leave you with a feeling of low self-esteem. It could even form one of the biggest shocks in your life.

Tranquility · Answer

Thanks Mister Micawber.
I noticed that you rearranged some of the sentences and changed some words order, but do you think they are wrong in their former order?
I need your advice in this respect, if you please.

Best regards.

Mister Micawber · Answer

I correct for grammar, vocabulary and style.  Where I changed it, it did not read well.  I'm not prepared to explain all my changes, some of which are complex.  If you have a specific question, please ask.

Tranquility · Answer

Yes, I have some specific questions. First, is it correct to say ' a life with a new taste'? Also, can I use the verb 'feel' for nonhuman or nonliving things like the word 'life' so that you wrote 'life feels different'? And, if you please, what about the following sentence: this person is of little importance and value, is it correct?The last question is about the difference in usage between 'may' and 'could'.

I am really grateful to your replies.
Thanks a lot.

Note: if there are mistakes about punctuation marks, please tell me.

Mister Micawber · Answer

First, is it correct to say ' a life with a new taste'?-- This sounds only slightly unusual, but look what you wrote: 'Life starts to look different with new taste.' Do you see the problem with that?

Also, can I use the verb 'feel' for nonhuman or nonliving things like the word 'life' so that you wrote 'life feels different'? -- Yes. This is the linking form of the verb: Life feels different [to me].

And, if you please, what about the following sentence: this person is of little importance and value, is it correct?-- No, it is redundant. 'Importance' and 'value' ovelap in meaning too much.

The last question is about the difference in usage between 'may' and 'could'. -- 'Could' here is stronger and more direct.

if there are mistakes about punctuation marks, please tell me.-- Your punctuation seems generally fine.

Tranquility · Answer

Thanks a lot.

Just please correct my submission

Top answer

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬

Related Questions