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Myle Posted 19 years ago
Just a dream?
Oh blade, you are so cold
My life is returning back
I don't feel the pain
The darkness is my sight
The deafness is my voice
The void is my mind
God, hear my plea as I come to you
Blade, you are so hot
I can fly.
But my dream is slipping
Your face is still there
I hear my name
I return back
The blade is removed
The blood has stopped
There is just a scar
...I woke up,
it was a dream.
Yeah, I am pretty sure.
But I cannot deceive myself
I am completely drained.
Could some check for syntax errors?
My life is returning back
I don't feel the pain
The darkness is my sight
The deafness is my voice
The void is my mind
God, hear my plea as I come to you
Blade, you are so hot
I can fly.
But my dream is slipping
Your face is still there
I hear my name
I return back
The blade is removed
The blood has stopped
There is just a scar
...I woke up,
it was a dream.
Yeah, I am pretty sure.
But I cannot deceive myself
I am completely drained.
Could some check for syntax errors?
Top answer
You should work on adding more depth and showing things. It seems somewhat too bland, purposely or not. But it could be well, just needs more individualistic kick and voice.
- You should work on adding more depth and showing things.
- It seems somewhat too bland, purposely or not.
- But it could be well, just needs more individualistic kick and voice.
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1 Answers
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You should work on adding more depth and showing things. It seems somewhat too bland, purposely or not. But it could be well, just needs more individualistic kick and voice.
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