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Cboutin3 Posted 13 years ago
Grammar

Is this worded correct?

Soon after the fall of Silvanesti, Mina warned Galdar that an assassination attempt would result in her appearing dead, but that he should expect a miracle. When Mina was then seemingly killed by a poisoned ring, a funeral was held for her in Silvanesti, which was attended by Targonne. During the ceremony, Mina rose from the supposed dead and ordered Galdar to execute Targonne for trying to poison her.
  

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Soon after the fall of Silvanesti, Mina warned Galdar that an assassination attempt would result in her apparent death , but that he should then expect a miracle. Subsequently , Mina was killed by a poisoned ring , and her funeral, attended by Targonne, was held in Silvanesti. During the ceremony, Mina rose from the dead and ordered Galdar to execute Targonne for poisoning her.

  • Soon after the fall of Silvanesti, Mina warned Galdar that an assassination attempt would result in her apparent death , but that he should then expect a miracle.
  • Subsequently , Mina was killed by a poisoned ring , and her funeral, attended by Targonne, was held in Silvanesti.
  • During the ceremony, Mina rose from the dead and ordered Galdar to execute Targonne for poisoning her.
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Soon after the fall of Silvanesti, Mina warned Galdar that an assassination attempt would result in her apparent death, but that he should then expect a miracle. Subsequently, Mina was killed by a poisoned ring, and her funeral, attended by Targonne, was held in Silvanesti. During the ceremony, Mina rose from the dead and ordered Galdar to execute Targ

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