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Carter Lee Posted 10 years ago
Grammar

Is this sentence correct?

Hi.

I'm trying to modify below sentence. But I'm not sure there's how to more simple and easily sentence.

"I want to relocate because of the excellent opportunity I feel this role & responsibilities I am very interested in the responsibilities and believe that it warrants my relocation, also, it gives the multiple experiences interact with the different people in different locations. I strongly believe that this is right decision."
  

Top answer

It is too long and repetitive. Use this: I want to relocate because of the excellent opportunities this position offers, including interaction with different people in different locations.

— Mister Micawber

  • It is too long and repetitive.
  • Use this: I want to relocate because of the excellent opportunities this position offers, including interaction with different people in different locations.
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4 Answers
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It is too long and repetitive. Use this:

I want to relocate because of the excellent opportunities this position offers, including interaction with different people in different locations.
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Mister MicawberIt is too long and repetitive. Use this:I want to relocate because of the excellent opportunities this position offers, including interaction with different people in different locations.
What if you are hiring manager, how do you feel? And what if you were me, how to fix as below the sentence?

"I want to relocate because of the excel
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Carter LeeWhat if you are hiring manager, how do you feel?
I would feel fine.
Carter LeeAnd what if you were me, how to fix as below the sentence?
I have just fixed that above; do you not read our responses at all?
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Sorry I use wrong word about fix.
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