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Kouroshh Posted 13 years ago
Grammar

Is this email written correctly?

Following your previous email I would like to provide you information which you were asked me.

My name:
My family name:
Date of birth:

Moreover, I should mention that I was encountered a problem after I wanted to register my name for the future GRE exam. At this moment, I am not able to log in to my account. I have tried to log in through different email addresses too but unfortunately it does not work.

I would greatly appreciate it if you could help me out on this problem.
  

Top answer

Vocabulary suggestions in blue Grammar corrections in red Regarding your previous email I would like to provide you with the information which you requested . My name: My family name: Date of birth: Moreover, I should mention that I was encountered a problem after I tried to register my name for the future GRE exam. At this moment, I am not able to log in to my account.

— MrBen

  • Vocabulary suggestions in blue Grammar corrections in red Regarding your previous email I would like to provide you with the information which you requested .
  • My name: My family name: Date of birth: Moreover, I should mention that I was encountered a problem after I tried to register my name for the future GRE exam.
  • At this moment, I am not able to log in to my account.
  • I have tried to log in through different email addresses too but unfortunately it does not work.
  • I would greatly appreciate it if you could assist me with this problem.
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5 Answers
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Vocabulary suggestions in blue
Grammar corrections in red

Regarding your previous email I would like to provide you with the information which you request
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Thank you so much! I greatly appreciate your help!
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You're welcome and good luck on the GRE!
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The poster above me, mrBen, has the grammar part right, but there a few comma splices. I'll go ahead and correct them.

"Regarding your previous email, (comma) I would like to provide you with the information which you requested.

My name:
My family name:
Date of birth:

Moreover, I should mention I encountered a problem after I tried to register my name for
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I agree with the first comma after "email," but regarding the commas around "too" I have to disagree. Of course they are correct, but I feel they are also optional. I am seeing "too" at the end of a clause more and more without commas and I tend to avoid using them in this situation myself. In my experience teaching, I find that students using too many commas is a much bigger problem than using
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